Holder of my Heart
by klcm
Summary: Morgan shows Garcia who really holds her heart
1. How I Love You

**DISCLAIMER: I own nothing**

**A/N:**_Right, so this is for KricketWilliams, whom I promised a bit of romance to sit right next to "To Love and Lose"... so here's the beginning of a whole lotta love! _

_If there's any romantic moments you wanna see, let me know and I'll try my best to fit them in amongst what's going on in this pot of loving ;)_

_I hope you enjoy!_

**-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- Holder of my Heart -=-=-=-=-=-=-=-**

"Garcia!" Derek called out; he'd watched her walk passed the bullpen for the umpteenth time that day as she worked and now as the day slowly clawed to an end he decided he needed to talk to her. Watching her turn on her leopard print stilettos she gave him a bright smile, "Hey Baby Girl."

"Hey Shug," She purred back and then looked him up and down, trying to make a connotation of what this surprise call was about, "What can I do for you, Handsome?"

"I need to talk to you," Derek started and all of a sudden the butterflies in his stomach morphed into nerves that were slowly creeping throughout his body. "In private."

"Oh," She sounded and slowly nodded, "Sure thing." She then turned and went towards her office. "Must be important."

"To me it is," Derek mumbled as he watched her key in the code to unlock her door and then followed her in and as though it were the first time ever being in Penelope's little cove, he smiled as he looked around and saw the photos of them together, the gifts he'd given her. He was as much a part of this office as she was.

"To you it is?" Penelope asked as she put the workload she had in her arms down on her desk and then turned back to Derek immediately seeing how pensive and troubled he looked. "What's up, Baby Boy?" Penelope asked as she quickly went back to be in front of her.

"You," He simply said and he saw some hurt register in Penelope's face, especially as her smile began to drop and confusion washed over her heavily. "I've tried so hard to not get like this, but I honestly don't know how much longer I can go without saying I love you."

"I love you too," Penelope said and a small smile graced her lips once more. It was the truth, ever since Emily's _death_ and then her subsequent reincarnation they had become a lot closer than they ever had been. So much so that one night, Penelope decided that she needed to let Kevin go before she ruined his life furthermore. She couldn't live and sleep with one man and then spend mostly every waking moment with another and love it more.

Derek shook his head, "I'm in love with you. So much so that my heart can't take you looking at other men. I hate them for getting the attention that I would love to have. I love the way you call me endless nicknames, and how you look at me and I love how you fill my head every second of the day. I love the way you know when I'm hurting, and how you panic when something goes wrong out on the field. I love how you look after me when I don't think I need it. I am just whole heartedly in love with everything you give me, Penelope and I am done refusing to tell you. I have the right to share this as much as you have the wrong to know." He looked at her and quickly recounted himself now thinking he had done more bad than good at that admittance. "I understand if this is not what you want. It's your choice as much as it is mine."

"You think this is all one sided?" Penelope asked as Derek just stood before her, all of a sudden silent as a mouse. So unlike his normal self that it unnerved her some. She saw him begin to mentally hit himself at what had just transcended and she absolutely adored this side of Derek – the soft and sentimental, easily hurt by love side of Derek Morgan. She was grateful that she got to see it. It was another part of him that just caused her to fall deeper in love with him than she already was. "It's not. I just never made a move for several reasons."

"What?" Derek quickly asked, trying to understand this turn of events.

"I never wanted to ruin us. Especially seeing as your best thing in my life," She smiled meekly at him and looked down a little before looking back up. "You don't know how lucky I feel I am to have you in my life."

"Possibly as much as I do?" Derek mentioned and smiled at her.

"I never thought I was your type. The girls you go for are stunningly beautiful. I'm the complete opposite of them and I found that fact pretty superior and it scared me off ever telling you. I'm never going to be, I never want to be them. I'm always going to be me and I just assumed that wasn't what you wanted. Especially when you had a string of women that made you enjoy yourself."

"I never found a girl that _felt_ right though," Derek admitted solemnly and regretful at his shameful past as a player and he was finding it hard to not touch her. To break this sentimental moment with a kiss, but he had vowed to hear Penelope first. He didn't want to give too much for it not to be returned to him. "No other girl was you," He admitted and looked her straight in the eyes. "None of the girls that pour themselves out to me are you, Penelope and I am so tired of having superficial, vain women when all along I had you there waiting. I made you think I ignored your beauty for what it was and for that I am truly sorry. Just understand that I am so in love with you that you're all my mind thinks about. When I see you my heart stops – each and every time like it's the first. Christ, I have been jealous of Kevin from the moment I saw you meet him. I'm not the jealous type." He paused for a moment, "Unless it involves you. You're worth getting jealous over because you are the best price to be had." He took her hand in his then, "I just hope you understand how much I love you now, Baby."

Penelope couldn't withhold the smile as her heart seemed to get that irregular beat in its rhythm that she always felt when she thought of Derek. She understood the full extent of Derek's love, it was hard to miss. She just felt it was her turn to give back to him what he had given her. He needed to now understand how much she loved him or at least get the ball rolling before she kissed him to prove the actual extent of love.

"I'll show you how much I really love you," Penelope commented and left her position in front of him to go to her desk and grab a photo. She held it up for him to see and he couldn't hide the smile as it spread across his face. It was the first ever photo of them two. "I keep this photo to remind me that I was lucky to have the start of something truly magical," Penelope told him and put the photo of them two down and picked up another. "This one because it was the best birthday I had ever been given since my parents died and this," She said as she replaced the photo and picked up another, "This one shows me that I had the best New Year's eve kiss ever that year."

Every poignant photo was of the pair of them.

"I should've made you mine that night," Derek told her tentatively, "I should've made you realise why that kiss was so passionate."

"Yeah," She begin with a teasing tone, "You shoulda." She smiled coyly then as she realised that the world around her was spinning, helping her and Derek's relationship evolve into something much more powerful than it had ever been.

"I realise now," Derek quickly said, hoping that that would suffice to at least gain him one kiss before reality set in and proved this was some vivid day dream. "If it's not too late that is."

"It's never too late until it's gone," Penelope calmed his wounded soul of his wrongdoing. "You're not too late."

Derek didn't need to be told twice. He didn't need Penelope to put it in writing or draw him up the instructions. He knew exactly what he needed to do at that.

Slowly, he took his hand and ran it up and along Penelope's jaw line, tilting her head to look at him, and even slower he leant in and kissed her, his hand now cupping the back of her head in the embrace. It didn't take long for Penelope to respond, and her hands ran up his arms and rested on his back, making him understand this moment wasn't supposed to end any time soon.

For once, Derek saw fireworks.

The dream never ended.

**-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- Holder of My Heart -=-=-=-=-=-=-=-**


	2. How I Surprise You

**DISCLAIMER: I own nothing**

**A/N: **_For the lovely and talented KricketWilliams =) My HEA cookie ;)_

_Thanks for all of the reviews! Here's some more romance..._

**-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- Holder of my Heart -=-=-=-=-=-=-=-**

Penelope had just literally closed her eyes that night, a small smile on her lips at what had happened that day, when the doorbell went. Opening one eye she looked around and wondered if she just ignored it the button pusher might well push off themselves.

Ignoring it, Penelope enjoyed revelling in the peace that seemed to be around her.

That was until the doorbell got attacked repetitively and she knew only one person that did that. Getting up she went to the window and saw Derek downstairs at the main entrance. She hadn't told him the new pass code since it was changed and only now she remembered she needed to tell him. He looked up at her and she shot him a smile and then went and released the main entrance door and then unlocked her door and left it as she went to get him a drink.

"How much longer were you going to leave me to wait out there?" He asked her casually, "In the cold." He ended with a slight pout on his lips.

"Poor Baby," Penelope told him, offering him a mock look of sympathy. "I've let you in," She paused, "From the cold." She finished in the same tone he had used.

"And since when did the code get changed?" He asked her ambiguously.

"Sorry, Sugar," Penelope apologised, "A couple of weeks back, but you haven't been around here in a while and I completely forgot. What with work and stuff..."

"No worries. I think I can forgive you," He replied and smiled at her brightly. "I forgot to tell you something earlier. In amongst the kissing that is."

"Oh yeah?" She asked and crossed her arms over her chest preparing to hear this.

"I forgot to tell you we were doing this properly. Dating that is. I intend to do it all properly." Derek told her confidently. Derek might have been the guy that never kept a woman for long, but he intended to change that. He was prepared to date, to romance, to do whatever it was to secure this relationship and keep pristine and perfect.

"Properly?" Penelope asked and arched one of her eyebrows.

"Yeah, you know," He paused and smirked stepping closing to her, "First date – _first base_," He told her and leant in closer, "Second date – _second base_," He got closer to her, "Third date-"

"Mmm _third base_," Penelope finished and closed the gap to kiss him. First base well and truly hit in one. She couldn't help but lick her kiss bruised lips as they parted and their eyes met. "Look forward to that homerun," Penelope finished as she separated from him. "Now, Handsome, what can I do for you?"

"I'm taking you on a date."

"Like now? This evening?" Penelope asked dubiously and then looked down at herself and realised she was in her rattiest clothes, her makeup nothing like it had been a couple of hours ago when she had seen him last. She suddenly felt a blush of embarrassment wash through her cheeks and in seconds they were burning.

Derek stepped in and stole her attention, "You are beautiful." Derek looked at her and offered her a smile, "Whatever you wear, _or don't wear_."

Penelope smiled meekly and laughed a little at that. No man in her life had ever been this sentimental towards her, had ever taken time to kill her insecurities this early on in any potential relationship.

"It's not about the makeup, or the clothes, or the hairstyles, Penelope. It's always been about you. _You're_ the reason _they're_ all beautiful not the other way round."

Penelope's blush changed, it wasn't full of embarrassment, she was taking in Derek's words and feeling adored by it all. "You're a sweet talker, but you still haven't curbed my full curiosity yet. What's this date?"

"Can I show you something?" Derek asked and headed to her door. He wasn't going to curb her curiosity; he was going to satisfy it completely.

"I am not leaving this apartment looking like this," Penelope said and looked down at her holey jumper. "Let me get dressed into something that isn't falling apart on me."

"Mmm," Derek mused as she turned to go into her bedroom, "Falling off you."

"Homerun!" Penelope called over her shoulder to remind him of his own plans.

It didn't take long for Penelope to be dressed in near normal clothes and being taken from her small home, out of the door and heading for the roof – coat in hand. All her attempts at getting information out of Derek proved futile instantly.

"What is this?" Penelope asked as she was led out onto the roof of her apartment building after what felt like forever. She looked at the table set up – a meal for two ready, and she saw multiple pillows piled on the floor looking ready to be laid upon. She let her forehead furrow in confusion as she looked at Derek.

"Count this as our first date," He told her simply.

Penelope looked at Derek in bewilderment. It hadn't been all that long ago that he declared his love for her. Love that he couldn't contain any longer, love that he wanted to be hers. Twenty four hours hadn't even past since he had told her and completed her and here they were on the roof of her apartment block with the most romantic first date ever possible. Also, she had left earlier than him and even that didn't leave someone the time to orchestrate something quite like this.

"H-how?" Penelope asked as her emotions choked her, and she had never felt so valued and doused in love in her life.

"I know the pass code, Baby. You know I'm known around her, getting it off one of the neighbours was simple. I left only a couple of minutes after you. I had all this stuff in the back of my truck," Derek told her and put his hand out for her, "Now, Mamma, we have dinner and then a little light star gazing to do," He told her and as she took his hand he pulled her closer to him, "Apparently there's supposed to be a lot of activity up there."

Penelope giggled at that and allowed him to lead her to her seat.

"It's only pizza, but I can't give you gourmet food and keep it warm all at once in these circumstances. Date two will be better."

"This is just perfect," Penelope calmed him as he looked ready to gabble on and apologise. Penelope didn't want expensive restaurants and extravagance. She wanted Derek and time alone with him away from work and distractions. This date was her very dream date.

Derek relented and realised he had ticked the criteria for Penelope and served her, her first slice before pouring her a glass of her favourite wine.

Once they'd eaten, Derek stood and took Penelope over to the cushions and pulled her down into his grasp. He didn't want anything but her that night. Just some time to revel in this new found aura to life.

He heard Penelope tense a little as a shooting star passed across the night sky.

"You saw it too huh?" Derek asked as he watched Penelope's stare at the sky, so full of awe and contentment.

"Yeah," She confirmed and looked up at him, her eyes meeting his, the true extent of her happiness sitting right there for him to look at. "Did you make a wish?"

"Might have," He teased her gently. "Did you?" He asked and Penelope nodded, "Wanna tell me?"

"It might not come true if I tell," Penelope admitted as she withheld.

"Well, my mom always told me, if two people share the same wish then it would always come true," He told her and smiled, "I'm pretty sure that we wished for the same thing."

"Oh yeah? Tell me then what we wished for then, Handsome?"

"For this to be forever."

"Oh you are good when you wanna be, Hot Stuff," She said as she realised that her and Derek were more than a little in tune with one another. Years of sharing the same wavelength, of being able to react to the other hadn't changed at the say so of a kiss. If there was one thing Penelope wanted to bet on it was that her and Derek's intuitiveness to one another was only going to strengthen. "You in for the long run then, huh?" She asked and her insides restricted that maybe it was too new, too fresh, too early to be discussing the long term conditions of this relationship.

"More than I have ever been before," He told her with ease and settled back against the pillows. "That thing about the stars, Baby," Derek said as the silence lapsed in and they both just enjoyed this form of romantic domesticity. He waited for her to look up at him before he spoke again. "It's bullshit," He let her down and smirked, "I just needed you to know we're both on the same page. This is going to last forever."

"I know it is," Penelope replied honestly. After all, she didn't need shooting stars, or three wishes. As long as she had Derek she knew anything was possible and this love of theirs had been to undying to change that. "I really love you, Derek Morgan."

"I really love you too," Derek told her and watched her settle down looking up at him, using him to keep her warm in the chilly night. Derek continued to look down at Penelope; he had never seen a more beautiful sight in his life as he looked down at the one woman that held his heart. "Remind me why I never did this earlier?"

"Because the best things in life are worth the wait," Penelope told him and then settled back into his side, her head to his chest, her gaze looking up at the clear, starry sky.

**-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- Holder of My Heart -=-=-=-=-=-=-=-**


	3. Laying Around With You

**DISCLAIMER: I own nothing**

**A/N: **_They always say you are what you eat, well it seems I write what I eat! The sweets I used I had been eating all through my last lecture last week and then when I got home I still had some left and the ones used were some of the ones I had left... inspirational food at its best!_

_Hope you enjoy! Thank you for all of the awesome reviews! _

_P.S. Excuse mistakes – it's 2am over here in England, and it's been a while since I last posted for this one! _

**-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- Holder of my Heart -=-=-=-=-=-=-=-**

"Gimme!" Penelope said as she dived across Derek for the remote. "Gimme the remote, Handsome! We are not watching the game again!" She chided as the game's current score was reported. She hadn't seen Derek for nearly eleven days and ever since getting home from work they hadn't moved far from the couch – from each other.

"But it's a stress reliever though, Baby," Derek answered her simply. It might have only been four months ago that he and Penelope admitted their love for one another, but he was well and truly in love with this life now.

Penelope paused and sat back, her legs still over him and she looked at him, her eyebrow cocked in a sarcastic manner, "What about me?" She asked him simply, "Am I not you're stress reliever anymore?"

Derek shot her a knowing look.

"Pyjama days are definitely my best stress relievers," Penelope commented back to that look as she stretched out across Derek, snuggling in even more than she was. "But I think I enjoy my cuddly bear better," She added and kissed Derek on the lips delicately. "He's so dreamy."

Smirking, Derek nodded, "That's good to hear."

"He can be so mean to me though," Penelope added on and pouted, "Goes away for long times, teases me down the phone in this low voice and then waltzes back in like nothing happened."

"You should like stuff like that," Derek replied back. His hand running up and down her leg. "I do it with you in mind."

Penelope's lips pinched at that and she melted into a smile as she brought one of the cushions round to hit him.

"Oh so that's how you're going to play is it?" Derek asked and hit her back, kick starting a full on pillow fight between them. He knew she had been in a playful mood ever since they left work, but he guessed he had passed. Now he was proven it hadn't.

Penelope giggled as they messed around and hit him harder than he thought she could. Derek just hit back and lapped up this evening. It was rare that they got complete evenings off, but each and everyone they were planning to make worthwhile and absolutely unforgettable.

"Feather! Feather!" Derek cried mercy as he felt a feather get caught in his eye all of a sudden.

"C'mere," Penelope noted as she dropped her pillow and inspected his eye, "Look up." She guided him as she attempted to remove it. "Baby," She teased as she gently drew the feather out from the corner of his eye and then blew it from her finger tip.

The moment she looked back, Derek surprised her by kissing her before hitting her with the pillow. Penelope looked at him unimpressed and hit back, the pillow fight well and truly back on until they fell back down to the couch with each other.

The pair of them settled down. Derek enjoying the feeling of pure completeness as it sat within him wholly. Penelope enjoying having the one man she truly loved here with her. This was domestic bliss at its absolute best for the pair of them. Neither had reason to seek it elsewhere.

"I think it's time we thought about food," Derek mentioned moments later as his stomach started to rumble. "I'm gonna go out and get a feast."

"Oh I like your idea," Penelope mused at the thought of food. She let Derek get up, but felt the coolness from his absence set in. "_Haaandsome_?" She said as he grabbed is boots to put on.

"What's up, Sweetness?" He asked back as he came back into the room.

"Do you have to go?" Penelope whined, grabbing his hand in hers as he reached for the car keys. "Don't we have enough in the cupboards?"

Derek shook his head and dotted a kiss to her forehead, "Post case, Baby means no food." He told her and smiled, "I'll be back before you know it."

Sinking back down, Penelope watched him leave and decided to relish being able to flick through every channel to find something to watch without having to flick between the latest games that were on.

After all, she knew she didn't have long before Derek got back.

When Derek got home, Penelope was still sprawled out on the couch, exactly where he'd left her. She had her attention solely on the television, not even noticing him there.

"So you didn't move much in the time I've been gone eh?"

"It's not often I get to watch one of my shows," Penelope answered back and looked at him with a slick smile on her lips. "Get anything good to eat, Hot Stuff?"

Derek didn't answer, he approached her and turned the brown bag of groceries upside down, pouring its contents over the coffee table. "Everything we're not supposed to eat," Derek commented quite satisfied with what he had

"Oh I'm gonna need to work this off later," Penelope joked, hinting at Derek.

Derek slumped next to her, "I think I have some ideas."

"I never doubted it," Penelope answered back knowingly. "I think we need to give ourselves more of a reason to have an extra work out later."

"I think you would be right, Princess," Derek said as he leant forward and grabbed one of the bags of chips he had bought. He knew he'd feel guilty for this in the morning, but for now he was going to eat to his heart's content before getting his best guilty pleasure – Penelope.

Hours later, with most of the food gone, Penelope opened one of her favourite packets of sweets. She looked at them, eating away on them, feeding Derek some. She then passed him a sweet, and he took it, and it left her with a little smile sprawled on her lips, "Perfect," she told him and nodded to the sweet before he popped it into his mouth.

Derek read it, '_My Hero'_, and smiled, "I'm no one's hero."

"Spoken like a true hero," She told him and then popped a piece of candy into her mouth before searching for her next one.

Remaining silent, she handed him another Love Heart and another. Derek read them and smirked, 'All Mine, Heart Throb', they read and when he looked back up she had a seductive glare in her eyes. He put his hand out knowing there was more, '_Will you'_, he read out, '_Tease Me' and she passed another final one 'Heart Throb'_.

"Oh," He said and looked back, throwing the sweets to the side, "I can tease you all you like."

"You always do," Penelope admitted with the glint in her eyes only getting stronger and stronger. "I really need you, Derek," Penelope said, her addiction to Derek feeling somewhat gripping. "You've been gone for nearly two weeks. I really need you to make up for lost time."

"I think we need to take this upstairs then," Derek said, knowing full well that he could keep this going for hours in the bedroom, but on the couch gave him limited room to worship her entirely like always.

Penelope just allowed Derek to lead the way.

"Can I tell you a little secret?" Penelope asked as they lay entangled with one another later that night. She didn't look up at him, she just remained there.

"Course you can," Derek replied, "I thought we had no secrets."

"I have this one," She told him and continued to run her fingers across his perfectly toned stomach, across the minimal hair that had grown there. "What we have," She started and paused a little, "This is the most I've allowed myself to fall in love. I have never felt like this so quickly." She still refused to look at him, "I always told myself I wouldn't fall head heels in love ever. I didn't want to end up heartbroken because of it."

Derek remained silent, running his hand up and down Penelope's bare back.

"But I think I understand what a real first love feels like that," She admitted to him timidly and looked up at him, "Does that sound weird? That I'm in my thirties and for the first time ever I truly feel in love?"

"No, because they always say there's something about your first love."

Penelope smiled then, "There definitely is," She told him and then kissed his stomach before working her way up his body to his lips. "Really, really is."

**-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- Holder of my Heart -=-=-=-=-=-=-=-**


	4. Chocolate Goodness

**DISCLAIMER: I own nothing**

**A/N: **_So sporadic updates here again, but I have a lot planned =) I'm going away tomorrow, so you won't see a chapter 5 until Monday evening, but I promise you it will be worth the wait – in romance terms =P _

_Thanks for the reviews. I hope you all continue to love this as much as you already do =)_

**-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- Holder of my Heart -=-=-=-=-=-=-=-**

Penelope rested her elbow on the table as she drew on the table cloth of the pizzeria. She loved this place for its antiquity, for its use of paper table cloths to be doodled over and for the perfection of the food.

Derek had rang to tell her to wait here for him. He was heading back from a case and was taking her out for lunch before they had to finish reports up to get the next few days entirely clear of work. New week marked a new case; they needed to get all reports done after all.

In true Penelope fashion she didn't want to lose faith and leave so she just stayed there, at her table ready for two and drew away with the crayons that were left in the middle of the table. She kept the optimism that he was just running behind. Yet as the minutes ticked by even she couldn't stop her hope from fading bit by bit.

"Chair taken?" Penelope heard and shot up with a jump of surprise.

Derek watched her melt into a smile, her look of lost hope completely diminished as she just shot him a look of lust and adoration. He have never seen her so happy to see him there in front of her than right at that moment.

"Well you see," Penelope said as she tapped her crayon to the table top, "I think this smoking hot man I'm waiting for has forgotten about me, so I guess that chair isn't taken."

Derek slid into the chair and shot her an apologetic smile. "We got caught in mass traffic, Baby. I tried to call, but my cell died." He admitted to her, "I know it sounds like I'm making up excuses here to cover my ass, but it's the truth. I really am sorry I left you hanging."

She had to smile. She could never stay angry at Derek at the best of times, and right now she really couldn't. It wasn't his fault if there was traffic or his battery died on his cell phone. Even if it were a lie, the truth would be out as soon as they got back into work.

"You best set about making it right, Handsome," She joked with him, offering him a little smile. "I was contemplating leaving within the next few minutes."

"Is that right?" He asked her and she nodded as she continued to draw away. "Well you see, to me, it looked like you were creating the next Picasso."

She couldn't help but laugh at that. She looked up at him, her head still in the downward position. "This," She said, pointing down at the artwork, "Will not be anywhere remotely close to the work of Picasso or Van Gogh or even Michelangelo." She continued to tell him with a slick tone and sat up enthusiastically, her hands frame the silly drawing animatedly. "This is a Penelope Garcia original and will end up in the bin like many of its fellow other pieces. It takes a lot of work to get these perfectly ready for such a gallery."

Derek chuckled at that and picked a menu up. Putting it down in front of him, he put his hands on it and looked at her, "I'm guessing it's a popular viewing it gets?"

"Oh, only the most popular!" She said with sarcastic enthusiasm before melting into a giggle. "I could go really high school on you here, Hot Stuff."

"Do it," He dared her, intrigued in what she was going to draw now.

Penelope leant in, picking up the pink crayon and drew an upside love heart and persisted to put their initials inside. She then looked back up at Derek, "I really love you, Derek Morgan." She told him and it was the truth. They might have only been dating five months, but she couldn't ever imagine being with anyone else after being with Derek.

For once her heart sang for Derek. She got butterflies even now when he kissed her, her skin still tingled with his touches and even now, his kisses seemed to tattoo themselves on whatever part of her body he plied her with.

"Good to hear," He replied as he leant across the table towards her, "Because I really love you too, Penelope Garcia."

Penelope blushed and dipped her head a bit – this love was still too real for her to absorb. She couldn't believe this was her life now. Her life with her best friend.

"But I think I need some food or I won't have the energy to show you how much I really love you later," Derek told her with a wink and a still sent, self assured smirk.

"Order away, my Chocolate Adonis," Penelope told him back.

As they waited for their lunch they joked and unwound from the case the way they always had. Except this time Penelope didn't stop her foot from travelling up and down his leg as he talked away, and she did everything to keep his fingers touching hers.

Both of them tried everything to keep the connection of skin unless they were eating.

"Think it's time we headed back," Penelope said as their plates were taken from them. She picked her glass up and finished her wine, "Especially if I want a bit of my chocolate goodness anytime soon."

"What is it with all the chocolate references huh?"

"Saving dessert for later," Penelope pointed out as she grabbed her purse ready to pay her share.

Derek quickly put his card down, showing she wasn't paying – again – and shot her a look, "Don't you always?" He asked her and the only response he received was Penelope licking her lips.

**-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- Holder of my Heart -=-=-=-=-=-=-=-**

Walking into work, the pair's hands fell apart from one another showing their respect to the rules they had been given in order to keep professional at work. They walked side by side, their hands occasionally touching one another, the fingers casually playing with one another's with soft affection.

Even in the elevator, as they stood right at the back, they couldn't control themselves. Neither knew how they'd make it through the next couple of hours of work. The only thing they both knew was that once they'd done that bit they had days of privacy and intimacy awaiting them.

"Oh following me to my office now are we?" Penelope teased as Derek didn't go towards the bullpen.

"I want a proper goodbye," Derek replied in a low tone, his body following her closer and closer as they neared her office. "Is that too much to ask for?"

"Baby Boy," She started as she got to her door. She went to put the code into the door, but turned to him, her back flush against the wall. "You never ask for too much."

Derek leant in at that, "Guess I need to ask more then."

Giving him a seductively smirk, Penelope turned back, leaving him waiting and then entered the code to her office and flung the door open. Ready to be ravished by the man that loved her. He always gave her a worthwhile goodbye between their professional encounters.

Stepping into her office, Penelope froze to her spot, Derek immediately walking into her.

"Whoa, Baby," Derek said as he put his hands to her shoulders to steady them both. He looked up when he was sure he wasn't going to fall, "Kevin?"

"Hi," Kevin said as a welcome. "I hope you don't mind me being in here - waiting. I didn't touch anything. I know you hated that. So I just," He looked around, down at his feet, around his surroundings, "Stood here." He finished and looked at her sheepishly.

"Why are you here, Kevin?" Penelope asked her ex boyfriend, her tone completely full of hostility and ice.

"I-I," He said and paused looking Penelope up and down. He could see a change in her, that she was so full of confidence and happiness. She harboured no regret anymore, no worries. She seemed to be free now and he knew he had a lot of lost time to make up for if she gave him a chance to.

Moving into the room, Penelope stood between the two men, still waiting on Kevin to reply to her, "Well?" She asked as she dropped her purse onto her chair. She wasn't in the mood for Kevin to clam up so she looked at him with a fiery glare, "Speak or get out." She told him powerfully, she wasn't ready to follow Kevin's lead anymore, or wait around for his explanations and plans. Kevin was simply her past now.

What she got in response stilled her even more than his presence alone.

"I want you back, Penny," Kevin said after a few moments. "Let me win you back."

**-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- Holder of my Heart -=-=-=-=-=-=-=-**


	5. Unnecessary Words

**DISCLAIMER: I own nothing**

**A/N: **_I'm back! Unfortunately it seems my muse has remained away! Stupid thing! However, I had this written beforehand and I promise to have more for you soon! _

_Thanks for the reviews as always, and I hope you like what's to come..._

**-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- Holder of my Heart -=-=-=-=-=-=-=-**

Penelope looked from the holder of her heart to the breaker of her heart and knew it wasn't a tough decision. Kevin wanted the chance to beg her to make a life with him and she was giving him the opportunity. She was going to allow him to make her feel like she had done wrong all those months ago – if he could.

"Please Penny," Kevin said and took her hand in his, "You know we're meant to be."

Penelope crossed her arms over her chest and waited for the fallout of Kevin's idea of persuasive love.

"If you take me, you know you'll never be heartbroken. I can promise you that, he can't. You've seen how he is. I don't want you to end up being another notch in his bed post. You know you don't want to be something he can just wash away when he's through with."

Penelope quickly looked at Derek as he remained quiet and then she looked back at Kevin.

"I can give you stability and security and I can offer you a life. Not an expensive life, but I can offer you a good life," Kevin told her, "Think about it, Penelope. I've found that farm that I promised you too long ago. It's waiting for us to move into. It needs its owners and you know that that's where your future is meant to be. Not here with the same people and the same nightmares. Penny you're not really going to run off into the sunshine with this real life 007, not when you have me."

Penelope looked down as Kevin took her hands in his, "I love you like no other, Penny. That's no lie and I know this is your home, and they're your family, but you have the chance to make a new life. Not ruin it. You know in this world that we're a couple that fit. If it's me next to you, you fit in properly," He paused, sucking in a deep breath before finishing this part of his fight. "Plus, Derek Morgan only knows one thing," Kevin said, for once not scared of Derek as he fought for the woman that held his heart. He had meaning to be here, a purpose.

Penny's vision narrowed on Kevin then, "And what's that?"

"He only knows how to break hearts, not keep them," Kevin told her and saw emotions flicker across Penelope's face at almost lightening speed.

"Enough," Penelope cut him short, "I've heard enough from you, Kevin."

"Well," Kevin spoke disdainfully as he looked at Derek, "I guess we gotta listen to the other side as well."

Penelope knew this wasn't what she wanted to happen, but at the same time she needed to hear Derek speak the words that made her heart sing so that Kevin knew full well it was over. That there really was nothing here for him anymore.

She needed Derek Morgan to fight for her.

"I don't need to," Penelope defied Kevin's chance a duel. She quickly decided she didn't need Derek's side of it to know her choice. Her mind was more than already made up entirely.

"Please Baby Girl," Derek near enough begged at her. He wasn't giving her the look of control or dominance. Unlike Kevin's stare, Derek was looking at her like he was a losing man. Derek looked like he was about to lose everything his entire being was made up of. He needed one chance and chance only. He watched her give him a smile, telling him to have his say. "You know me," He started slowly and delicately, "But there's so much you don't know about me. How much of me is down to you.

"I can't win in this world without you. This race that I always seem to be in, I can't beat unless you're at the finishing line waiting for me. That or running it with me," He gave a bashful grin her way as he continued to admit this, "Without you around I feel lost. I was lost. I'm not the same man and never will be without you, Penelope. When I'm out on a case, the only reason that I don't charge into buildings or put myself in danger anymore is because I know full well that you will lose so much more in your life than just a friend. I know that I will lose so much more than my life as a result."

He stopped for a moment, shaking his head, almost shaking awake the words his was searching for.

"Penelope what I'm saying is that before when I had you in my life I knew you loved me, you were my reason for getting up, for lasting a day, but now, having you in my life knowing that you're as in love with me as I am with you means that I have a reason to everything. I have a reason to smile, to breathe, to love. I can't erase you from my life anymore and I don't want to ignore the fact that my heart doesn't beat quite so fast without you around. I don't want to lose the feeling that I get whenever you're around, whenever you kiss me, or tell me you love me because without it I'm just a nobody." He looked at her so confidently as he went to speak again, "You make me a somebody, and I want you in my life forever."

Penelope couldn't help but release a little "oh" as it slipped out from her lips. Her eyes watered ever so slightly as she stood and listened and again she felt the familiar skip of her heart. Something she loved the feel of seeing as she now had purpose to put it to.

"Kevin's right when he said I could easily just wash you away, but not anymore. I was a player, but that all stopped the moment you gave me a chance," Derek told her, his heart thumping violently in his chest as he admitted this to her – and Kevin Lynch. "I told you once that none of those girls felt right-"

Kevin sniggered at that, but Derek remained undeterred.

"But I also told you that same day that that was because it was you that I wanted. I don't need to look at any other women when I've come home to you every night since. You complete me like no one else. You're who I have been searching for and, okay maybe I might not deserve you, but I love you so much and I promise to never ever hurt you or pressure you into anything that you're not comfortable with. I will only ever want the absolute best for you. So if Kevin is who you want, like truly want, I understand. I will back down because at the end of the day, your life means more to me when you're happy than it does to watch you be sad." Derek gave Penelope her life, he didn't offer her an ultimatum, he allowed this to be her choice. "You just listen to your heart, Baby Girl."

He had fought for her, Penelope thought, right until the end. He had fought for her tooth and nail and bled his heart dry in front of her and Kevin and then he had allowed her the opening to pick her happy ending.

Kevin had just told her it was with him. After he was done criticising he had told her where her future lay. It was someone that looked full of discrimination and prejudice because of what they liked doing, how they dressed. He had stereotyped them away from society. He had written Derek out of her future.

However, Derek spoke to her with honesty and told her exactly what it was that he got out just having her around. He had spoke his heart and soul and had, again, made her fall heavily in love with a man she was already proclaimed to. Everyone knew how in love she was with Derek.

"Thanks for the ultimatum Kevin, but I saw no future with you eight months ago, I still don't see it," Penelope told him truthfully. "I cannot live with you again. You seem to think the world is against you, that it doesn't want to accept you, but it really doesn't care what you wear or how you spend your free time. As for us only being accepted if we're a couple-" She paused and looked at Derek and offered him a smile, still seeing his sadness a bit, "-it doesn't work like that. Love doesn't work on that basis."

"For us it does," He fought back determined.

Penelope shook her head at him, "No, Kevin, it really doesn't. There is some girl out there for you, believe me there is, but I'm not her."

Kevin didn't say another word, he shot Derek a killer glare before turning to leave completely defeated.

"You didn't have to fight for me there," Penelope told Derek as she turned to him, taking his hand in hers.

"I needed you to know how much I love you, Penelope," Derek told her and he just looked at her in the silence of the moment. He knew that he would fight everyday to keep her if it came down to it. He would do anything to keep her with him until the worlds end.

"You don't need to prove how much you love me every day, Handsome," Penelope told Derek candidly.

Derek pulled her close him, "Yes I do."

Smiling, Penelope looped her arms around his neck, "No you don't," She said pulling him down for a kiss. "I already know."

"How?"

"I'll show you how," Penelope answered back and gave him an almost euphoric kiss. The butterflies fluttering free, the firework's being released with bigger and brighter bangs, the chemistry at its most reactive.

Sometimes words just weren't enough.

**-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- Holder of my Heart -=-=-=-=-=-=-=-**


	6. Should've Been Me

**DISCLAIMER: I own nothing**

**A/N: **_So it's been a while, but literally life took over and swallowed me whole! I swear! However, I'm hoping this will make up for the neglect! _

_Enjoy, and thank you for all of the reviews!_

**_RATED M!_**

**-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- Holder of my Heart -=-=-=-=-=-=-=-**

"I was always told your life isn't made up of the breaths that you take, but of the moments that take your breath away. I gotta say I never truly believed in it," Penelope admitted to Derek as the night drew in. She smiled at him then, "Until you admitted you loved me." She watched Derek's face break into a smile and she couldn't help but smile meekly at him. "Each time you kiss me I'm left breathless. Every time you look at me I lose my mind and I always promised I would never allow myself to fall this head over heels for any man."

"What changed that, Baby?" Derek asked her suddenly intrigued.

"You fighting for me earlier," Penelope told him and looked him in the eyes. "That proved to me that I fell for the right guy and he caught me."

"I promise to always catch you, Penelope," Derek vowed to her. "I promised to hang around and look after you for the rest of my life and now I can really, really make sure I do just that."

"I can't ask for much more," Penelope replied honestly and gave him a kiss. "This is the life you wanted right? Here with me?"

"Always with you," Was his only reply. He wasn't going to butter it up, or lie to her. It was simple. He hadn't realised he had wanted this life until Penelope and he had started an exclusive relationship. Now he had it he had no intention of losing it. He was just happy to know that his earlier moment with Kevin had seemed to seal the deal. He had proven that he didn't care about anything else other than Penelope's happiness.

He now realised that Penelope was only at her happiest when she was with him.

"Where you going?" Derek asked as she suddenly sat up. Her spot next to him now going cold rapidly.

Penelope looked over her shoulder as she stood completely. "Come and wash my back for me, Handsome," Penelope lured Derek up from his spot on the couch. She was going to show him how appreciative of the earlier show she was.

**-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- Holder of my Heart -=-=-=-=-=-=-=-**

"Derek," Penelope gasped lowly as Derek pushed her against the mattress. They were still slightly wet from the shower, towels lost on the way out of the bathroom. After using their time in the shower wisely they had thought they were sated, but it seemed that the moment the steam cleared they wanted more – _they needed more_.

All that seemed to matter at that moment was the need they both shared for the other.

"You're," Derek kissed into the valley of her breasts delicately, "So," another kiss, "Beautiful."

Penelope smiled as Derek began to raise himself up her body, her hands splayed across his back, keeping the proximity close. She felt his breath as it rushed over her skin and then looked into his eyes. The dark orbs now swirled to match his devil's grin as they worked their magic to conjure up a game plan.

She felt his hand slip down over her body, but it wasn't until he caught her clit with the tips of his fingers that she felt the chemistry begin to react more and more. She knew she should be used to this, to this attention, but she just wasn't. Every time seemed to be different even if it seemed the same from the outside.

Derek moved his hand down over her and felt how wet she still was from the first and second round in the shower and knew it wouldn't take long to have her climaxing at his will. "You tell me what you need," Derek instructed her; he knew full well what her reply would be.

The look Penelope gave him told him he was right.

"You," She whispered at him, "I need you to be in me." She told him, getting to the point, she needed to feel whole, she needed to feel his body and hers become one.

Like a genie, he readied her for him to make her wish come true. He teased her, kissed her, whispered sweet nothings at her until he was completely certain that she was ready for the fulfilment.

Putting his hands to her hips, he angled her appropriately, never ceasing the kisses. The moment he knew she was positioned right, he didn't waste time to drive his full erection into her heated wet core. Immediately he felt her gasp out loud and it was more like a cry of encouragement and endearment than anything else.

He felt her back arch in pleasure, her eyes closing slightly to the pure gratification of feeling him in her. It was as he watched her that he found an additional dose of adrenaline before allowing it to deplete entirely into the oncoming pinnacle.

Penelope felt the euphoric climax as Derek slid in and out of her in rhythm. He kept the pace going – fastening for a moment as the intensity rose - but kept the moment as it were. Almost cherished this bringing together of the body as if it were still the first time they had been this intimate.

"God," Penelope moaned breathlessly, as she could feel herself readying to climax wholly and just release pure ecstasy. She only had one God, and he was towering over her making this moment completely heavenly.

He felt his body match hers as he readied and he didn't try to fight it. He filled her and relaxed completely as the come down began. He felt sated at that moment, that the feat was worth it. That he had done his job to pleasure her and worship her properly.

Derek put his hands either side of her body. His breath heavy as he stared down at Penelope, her breath just as laboured, her eyes twinkling with that post orgasm sparkle. He couldn't help but notice how angelic she looked, her blonde hair the halo portraying her beauty and _innocence_. He knew the facade wouldn't last, it was a usual, but he also knew she could talk the dirty talk if necessary.

Without words, Derek fell down to the mattress, wasting no time to pull Penelope close to him. A different form of intimacy taking over. Before it was heated, lustful, naughty, now it was calm, tranquil, profound. This was the perfect cool down.

"It should have been me," Penelope whispered sleepily after a couple of moments silence as she rested her head on his chest.

Her body, like his, completely spent.

"Should have been you?" Derek asked confused as he continued to hold her close, his hand running up and down her bare arm. "What do you mean?"

Penelope sighed deeply, the sleep really taking her over, "To prove to you that I love you. After your speech, it should have been me to show you."

Smiling Derek just looked up at the ceiling, his mind revelling over this new found bliss. He had given Penelope his entire heart earlier that day, and here he was still a whole man, a happy man, and even better, a loved man.

"Oh I already know you love me," He told her honestly, and he could feel her smile against his skin.

Penelope plied a small delicately kiss to his chest before settling for the last time, "That's good then because I do."

Derek looked at Penelope as she slept peacefully next to him moments after her last sleepy murmur.

He had a haven now. He had security. He had true love.

He had a home at long last.

**-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- Holder of my Heart -=-=-=-=-=-=-=-**


	7. Best Unlaid Plans

**DISCLAIMER: I own nothing**

**A/N: **_Well! I know it's been forever and a day with this story! But after getting a prompt for this, I finally got the ball rolling and I hope to be able to issue more updates sooner rather than later! _

_Hope you like the romance though =)_

**-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- Holder of my Heart -=-=-=-=-=-=-=-**

"Well I know full well this isn't how you wanted to spend your day off, Baby," Derek said apologetically as he pulled to stop yet again behind the same car he had been following for almost an hour.

They'd been moved in with each other just over three months and this was the first chance they had had at getting near enough a day out without some form of distraction. He had wanted to give her a day at the beach to just calm her and allow her time to recoup after a series of hard cases, but it seemed everyone else wanted to take a mini break too.

"I know," She replied honestly and sweetly. "Spending time with you without a case to bother us is perfection in my eyes though, Hot Stuff."

Derek smiled then and moved the car forward in the slow moving traffic.

Looking around Penelope looked at families as they sat in their cars, the old couples on their daily outings, the young couples looking for a bit of freedom. She then remembered road trips as a child and smile wistfully at the thought.

"_Well_ _she got her daddy's car_," She started to sing under her breath without a second thought, "_And she cruised through the hamburger stand now. Seems she forgot all about the library_," She continued lost in the memories, "_Like she told her old man now. And with the radio blasting_. _Goes cruising just as fast as she can now. And she'll have fun, fun, fun. 'Til her daddy takes the T-Bird away_."

"Were you a problem child, Sweetness?" Derek asked as he listened to her sing the lyrics. She always sang around the house and it was something that he had grown to love hearing. Whether she be in the shower, washing up, cooking or just genuinely pottering around the house.

Penelope laughed a little, "I guess. I broke curfew - _a lot_. I did the night my parents died," She told him truthfully. "They were out looking for me when it happened."

"Oh Pen, you never told me that," Derek said sympathetically. He knew the ins and outs of her, but this, this was new.

Shrugging she looked at him, "Took me a while, but I'm at peace with it." She scrunched her face up momentarily, "I think." She smiled warmly and gave him a look, "Everything happens for a reason right?"

"That it does, Baby Girl." He told her, truly believing in that saying now that he had Penelope in his life exactly how she was meant to be.

"Plus," She started, gaining his attention as he went to look back at the road, "I wouldn't have meant my Chocolate Adonis had I not skipped that night and sometimes things have to fall apart for others to fall together."

"You're a walking philosophy script you know that right?" He joked with her, noting that her mood was full of regret and she wasn't dwelling on the news he had shared with him like he knew could have happened.

"And you my handsome chauffeur need to keep with the traffic," She teased him adoringly as she noted the traffic beginning to slowly roll forward. "Hmm, we need some more music. We're not too old for party!"

When she gave up thinking of a new song quickly, Penelope looked around the interior of the car wondering what they could do. They could switch between radio stations, play yet more games, watch the same people that were sitting around them or sit in silence whilst Derek drummed his fingers on the steering wheel, but Penelope knew they needed to get a little party going in order to get them to the beach before they were absolute stir crazy.

"IPod?" Penelope said as she looked around the cars multiple compartments, but failed to find anything that resembled either of their IPods.

"Check the glove box," Derek instructed her without a second thought. He focused on the slowing traffic again and as more and more break lights light up before the cars jolted as the handbrake went on he knew they were in for the long haul now. "So much for all day at the beach eh?"

"Erm," Penelope started her tone coming off distant, "Hot Stuff?" She called to him in the same tone, now laced with confusion.

Looking to his right, Derek found Penelope looking at him with wide eyes. His eyes drifted to her hands as she held up a red velvet box, "Fuck," He muttered under his breath.

"Wha-wa," She paused and looked at the box and shook her head before casting her bewildered expectant gaze to him once more to him, "Wanna explain?"

"I think it's pretty self explanatory really," Derek told her, inwardly kicking himself – _hard_. He had so many romantic ideas to run with in order to propose to her.

Recreate their first real date; put it at the bottom of a glass of her favourite wine; have someone drop it from the top of the roof of her old apartment block as they packed up the last of her things; have a string quartet turn up at her office; buy her a kitten with it on the collar; even pretend his computer was broken so she would have to take it apart and find the ring sitting in amongst the hardware.

Except it had just sat in the glove box of his ford and he had lost track of how many failed attempts he had had to remove it from it's not so secret hiding place. The quartet never arrived, the kitten never got picked out and he never had chance to fool her with a broken computer.

Now, however, as she knew about it he knew this was all a spur of the moment and he needed to make this as perfect as possible as he lived one of the most life changing moments of his entire life.

"I think this has _your_ explanation all over it," Penelope said, not putting the small box down and not even going for the lid to have a sneak peek.

"Well you see it goes like this," Derek started, a slick grin masking his lips.

Penelope grinned as the shock defused, this was really happening whether she liked it or not and boy did she like. "You're gonna have fun with this aren't you?" She asked him knowingly and popped the velvety box on the dashboard.

"Hell yeah, Baby Girl," He told her in a near enough cheer. "You see there's this girl that I've been crazy about for years and years and well she just doesn't realise that she honestly stole my heart with the first smile she ever gave me. Years ticked by and she became the best person in my life and then one day I woke up and smelt the roses, or in this case her smell of raspberries and vanilla," He shot her a look and she smiled brighter, "And well I realised that I could wake up tomorrow and not know what one kiss would feel like from her or what telling her I loved her felt like. So I bit the bullet and did the hardest thing in my life. I gave her my heart wholly and in return she gave me hers."

Penelope was jolted from her loved up trance as the horn of a car sounded and she jumped and realised the traffic was moving a little, "Think we best get moving."

"Right," Derek said slightly disappointed as he shifted the car into gear and moved on, the ring remaining on the dash board.

When they pulled to a stop again, he pulled the handbrake on and looked at her, stealing her gaze and refusing to lose it, he smiled and continued.

"Like before, I woke up the smell of raspberries and vanilla and I realised it was a smell I wanted to wake up to for the rest of my life and as I looked at the blonde sleeping next to me, I realised it was a sight I wanted to wake to every day that I live. I didn't want to lose out on the one thing that makes me truly happy, that makes me feel like I have a safe place. I don't want to make the one person that has ever loved me more than anything else in her life feel like she ever has to go with second best again."

He stopped the car again and just about caught the box as it fell off of the dashboard and he turned to Penelope and saw the tears in her eyes.

"I know it's not the most romantic proposal or the most imaginative like I had planned, but Penelope will you do me the honour of becoming Mrs Morgan, making me an honest man in the process and marry me?"

Without a second thought, Penelope leaned in and kissed Derek on the lips, this time ignoring the angry horns from behind as the traffic got moving. She wasn't letting anyone's road rage ruin this perfect moment for her. And if they tried then they were getting her two cents.

As she pulled back she smirked, "We all know I wear the trousers in this relationship as well so can you cope being Mr Penelope Garcia?"

"Already call myself that," He told her teasingly and watched her giggle. "What do you say to it, Baby Girl? All nine yards, picket fence and the kids?"

"Yes," She said suddenly without thinking, breathing or blinking it seemed, "Yes I'll marry you, Handsome. Yes I'll help put the fence up, and give you those kids and yes I want more than the whole nine yards."

"It's good you know to read between the lines," Derek told her with amusement in his tone and slipped the ring onto her finger. He felt he owed God as the ring fitted perfectly on to her finger. He held her hand and looked as the ring now sat where he had imagined it.

Penelope looked in awe at the glistening diamond as it sat perfectly and prettily on her finger and she couldn't believe this had happened and how much she had wanted it to happen. Now after dreaming it was her reality and it didn't seem real.

However, the resonating beep of a car's horn brought her straight back down to reality and the ring remained still on her finger.

"I think we better get going," Penelope pointed out, "We're the ones holding up traffic now."

"Oh well," Derek shrugged, "I think we have more than good cause to do so." He continued and stole another kiss before throwing the box over his shoulder and driving them off towards where their day was supposed to take them.

It might not have been the best proposal, but he was darn proud of himself for what he had said. Not that he had to dig far – everything he told her was the truth, take straight from the bottom of his heart.

Derek knew full well that he was the holder of Penelope's heart, always had been it had seemed, but now, without knowing it, he was the owner of her heart.

**-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- Holder of my Heart -=-=-=-=-=-=-=-**

**Song: The Beach Boys – Fun, Fun, Fun**


	8. Trying Too Hard

**DISCLAIMER: I own nothing**

**A/N:**_ Right this is turning into a bit of a snapshot series, BUT only of the romantic type! There will be no harm or foul come into this at all... as for the end, there'll be a little twist as my friend gave me an idea for another story, but it fits better with this ;) _

_Sorry for the delay, life's got a little hectic and will be like it until May time!_

_All mistakes are mine – I'm not feeling great so I'm posting and heading to bed early._

_For now enjoy!_

**-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- Holder of my Heart -=-=-=-=-=-=-=-**

The only respite Penelope found from cases right now was planning her dream wedding. However, even that was proving to becoming a point of stress for her at this point. She had barely made it home before sinking down onto the couch grabbing one of the millions of bridal magazines she'd accumulated as she went and tried to find a detox from the case.

It was almost just like any other case before this one, but this time she was trying to trundle her way through a work induced migraine, lack of sleep, wedding stress and lover's neglect - Something she had come to find was not a healthy combination in any order.

Throwing one of the magazines she ran her hands through her hair in frustration. This case was still addling her brain far too much for her liking and more than she wanted to admit. Since getting engaged she had come to find that any case involving families were hitting her harder and harder and rendering her more of a fruit loop than any other case did.

Now that she had her own family as a clearer goal in her future she realised just how anyone – and that meant anyone, man or monster – could rip that away and destroy. She found it playing on her heart strings and she found it torturous to watch the victims' wives, husbands, even the children mourn their loss.

Giving into her headache she tried to remove all case related thoughts and think ahead to the fact that in a few short hours, Derek would be home and he would ease her soul and take away the wounds just like she would for me.

Getting up off of the floor she turned the light off before heading back to the couch. Now she didn't have to move much she wasn't planning on going anywhere other than to her own little dreamland. Now she had a couple of days break, she was going to sleep this migraine off and allow her fiancé to wake her up.

"Baby," Derek's voice broke the sound barrier to her sleep, "C'mon Baby Girl wake up for me."

Penelope opened her eyes to look at him and smiled sleepily before realising that her headache was still very much thumping away. Her almost hello turned into a groan shortly after as the light penetrated her irises.

"Can you turn the lights off?" She asked him as she shielded her arms from the light.

Derek knew instantly what was wrong and so he did as she asked and headed to the downstairs bathroom to grab her meds for her migraine. As he came out he found her still lying prone against the cushions her arms over her eyes entirely.

"You haven't taken your pills have you?" He asked her knowingly as he switched on a lamp to just give them a bit of light so the darkness didn't make him accident prone.

Penelope allowed herself to look at him, "No, I just wanted sleep."

"Has it helped at all?" Derek asked her and chuckled as she made an almost inaudible response and covered her eyes. "C'mon, sit up and take these off me while I grab you some water."

"Why are you so good to me, Handsome?" Penelope asked as she obliged and sat up, taking the pills from his hand and watching him run through to the kitchen to grab her a drink and the race back to her.

"I wouldn't be a good husband-to-be if I didn't look out for my future wife now would I?" Derek said as he moved some of the magazines over not carrying that one or two spilt onto the floor. He wanted to sit down and talk to his fiancée before he carried her to their bed.

"Well I suppose," Penelope toyed as she swallowed one of the pills. She quickly popped the other one into her mouth and took a gulp of water to wash it down with. "I don't quite know what I'd do with my Noir Hero."

"You survived long enough before I got here," Derek told her with a careful smile.

"True, but now I have someone who loves me enough not to let me do it alone." Penelope stifled a yawn the best she could, "I've been so sleepy since that case." She then fell back against the cushions of the couch and curled up.

"Well you've got your pills, now you need a good night sleep," Derek told her sternly. "As your man I think I need to make sure this happens." He didn't give her a chance to respond, he sprung into action straight away.

Picking her up, he left the mess behind them and carried her to their bedroom. Slowly undressing her he got her into pyjamas against her protests and then gently tucked her in. He made quick work to have a shower and wash the last bits of the Unsub case off of his body before climbing in with her and pulling her tightly to his chest in preparation to hold her all night long.

**-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- Holder of my Heart -=-=-=-=-=-=-=-**

"How's the head?" Derek asked the moment he watched Penelope open her eyes and adjust to the morning light filtering in between the small gap in the curtains.

"Still there," She joked with him as she rolled onto her side. "I've still got a migraine." She said as she scrunched her face up as though it would relieve the pressure in her head.

Derek frowned, "Good thing you're not needed out of bed today."

"You're not going to leave me are you?" Penelope asked in an almost low, pitiful whine. "In this big ole bed that I've had to occupy myself for the last week or so."

"No I'm not leaving you, but we need food, Baby. Especially you," Derek told her and sat up readying to leave. "Want me to bring you up some of your magazines?" He asked her and she groaned in disapproval, "What's up?"

"This is proving so much harder to plan than it should," Penelope fretted about the wedding as she looked up at Derek as he sat staring down at her.

"You're trying too hard," He told her simply.

"Am not," Penelope argued back.

"Sweetness, you are," He replied, his tone not angry or showing aggression. "You're thinking too much, and trying to pull out all of the stops to make it something that isn't either of us." He said in a simple tone. "All that's needed is me and you and our family. There doesn't need to be flowers everywhere and a nice tux and a huge dress. We're getting married and that's all that matters at the end of it all."

"That and the perfect song to do our first dance to," Penelope corrected him quickly and shot him a smile full of ease. "But you're right. It does just need us and nothing else."

"Exactly the point I was trying to make," He said and leaned in ready to kiss her. "It needs you and me and a piece of paper that binds us together."

"Mm, til death do us part," Penelope murmured as she got lost in the passion of the kiss and allowed the heat of the moment to take over.

As Penelope forgot about the magazines, the cut outs, the brochures, the calculations, she felt Derek's presence and with that she knew she didn't care what her wedding turned into.

She didn't need glitz and glamour.

She just needed Derek Morgan.

**-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- Holder of my Heart -=-=-=-=-=-=-=-**


	9. Having Perfection

**DISCLAIMER: I own nothing**

**A/N:**_ I'm rooting for regular updates now I have a semi-plan for this! So wish me luck =P_

_For now, enjoy and know how thankful I am for the reviews, alerts and favourites =) _

**-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- Holder of my Heart -=-=-=-=-=-=-=-**

_Come here baby_

_Sometimes, I just wanna dance witcha_

_Hold me like this_

_Just rock with me_

Penelope had never felt more at ease, more at home, more in love.

Here she was, on her wedding day now officially a Morgan. She couldn't quite believe that she had welcomed love so easily with Derek and her payback was a sense of completeness that filled her wholly.

There had never been a bad day come between since and she found that the more her and Derek lived this life the more they came to realise several things: she could be the biggest pain in ass and he would call her on it; he would do idiotic things at work and she would scream at him and he would learn his lesson and, as a result, everyday it just got easier and easier to love one another.

Penelope wanted this moment for life. The look Derek gave her the moment he looked at as she walked down the aisle, the feel of his kisses, the brightness of their future. She was more than ready to keep this and she really hoped she

It might have taken them years to get here, but years were what had made this love enduring. Years were the one thing that made love foolproof and certain and undying. It might have taken them years to reach this point, to accept what everyone else had seen, but now they were here it was worth it.

It might have taken seven years to get here, but it was going to take decades to fulfil the requirements of a forever love.

Ever since giving into the heat of the love in her heart she had found every day welcomed happiness, welcomed sanity and most of all, welcomed true enduring love.

Just exactly how she was planning on keeping it.

_Put your arms around me boy_

_I got somethin' to show ya, tonight_

_And ya know I need ya undivided attention baby (whooOooAaa)_

_Ain't no otha girl can rock your world, like I_

_So, rewind_

_Make this moment last forever babe_

_It feels like your body's callin' me_

Derek couldn't keep his eyes off of Penelope. Not until this point where he held her in his arms and danced their first dance as husband and wife. It seemed like he had waited a lifetime to feel his forever be placed in his arms and have his future so clearly in front of him.

Long ago, before even meeting Penelope, Derek had written himself off as a lost cause in the love department and as a result he became the player that stuck with him for much too long. He sucked it up and held onto the stigma and destined himself to be a bachelor for the rest of his life.

Then Penelope happened and he realised that he didn't have to live under a label forever. If he gave it a chance, he could have it all - The love, the wife, the house, the dog, _the kids_. The future was bright, and it was now his for the taking to take.

He could still dream away the day imaging the rest of his life, but this time when he did it, Penelope was right there next to him every step of the way. She would be the frontrunner, his one true supporter and she would be the one that would give him the kids that he had come to find himself longing for.

Looking at Penelope for a quick moment he remembered the moment – only hours earlier – when she was led down the aisle with Hotch by her side. He found the moment to be ethereal and sacred and one that he prayed never left his dreams after today. He had always thought she had looked beautiful, but right now, on their wedding day, she flawless.

Here in his arms was the one woman that he wanted a lifelong love story with and if he had it his way he would be the one reciting it to her as they grew old together and reminisced about how flawless they had it.

_Talkin with my fingertips (yea, yeaa)_

_I got so much to say babe (words just get in the way baby, the way baby)_

_Let's see can you read my hips_

_Read between the lines (read)_

_As we bump n grind_

_Trust me it feels better from behind so one more time_

_So, rewind_

_Make this moment last forever babe_

_It feels like your body's callin' me_

Derek didn't feel Penelope move much in his arms as their first song carried on. What he did feel was his skin as she pinched it between her finger tips. "Ouch," Derek said and looked at her confused, "Was that for?" He asked her as she pinched herself a few seconds after, "And that?"

"I was just making sure we both weren't living the dream, Hot Stuff," Penelope told him with a smirk full of tease. "We didn't wake up!"

"No and we're not going to either," He told her, completely amused, "We are however going to be waking up to this every day."

"Oh boy does that excite me," Penelope told him with a glimmer in her eye. She was most excited for their honeymoon than anything right at that moment. Their wedding night and then the next week were going to be perfect and would remain undisturbed and blissful.

"Best be excited for it to happen for the next fifty years then, Baby Girl," Derek vowed.

Penelope pouted, "Only fifty years?"

"Silly Girl," He muttered in a chuckle as he pulled her back close to his chest.

_I don't want to come on too strong_

_But somethin' happens when we slow dance (when we slow dance)_

_I try to be lady-like_

_But I got you here tonight_

_But somethin' happens when we slow dance (when we slow dance)_

"This is perfect," Penelope whispered as she looked up to him moments later, "Absolutely perfect."

"It always was, Baby Girl," He told her with a delicate loving tone. "I love you, Mrs Morgan. I always dreamt of you being my wife, but I always thought you'd never love me back. I'm glad I took the drop to admit my feelings to you that day in your office."

"I'm glad you did too, Handsome," Penelope said and reached up for a kiss. "It was one of the best moments in my entire life." She smiled at the sweet memory of that day and then smiled even brighter as reality filtered in. "This is one of the best moments in my life."

"I think I can vouch for that, Beautiful," Derek responded and decided that he wanted to up his first kiss as newlyweds from earlier and he wanted everyone to bear witness.

He felt her respond immediately, the passion driving them forward, gearing their lust for one another, making each other become insatiable.

Pulling back, Penelope felt herself pant, but looked up at Derek with a bright smile. "Everyone deserves to feel like this," Penelope countered and put her head to Derek's chest and got lost in the perfection of this blissful moment.

Under all the watchful eyes, Penelope and Derek were more than happy to leave their love on display whilst they danced away their first evening of being husband and wife.

_Gotchu in my element_

_Time to represent who you with_

_The whole world's starin' at the both of us_

_And I'm givin' you all my love_

_This one's for the (dance floor)_

_Strictly for the (dance floor)_

**-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- Holder of my Heart -=-=-=-=-=-=-=-**

**Song: Keri Hilson – Slow Dance**

**A/N: **_You know me, I don't ever do the traditional wedding songs ;)_


	10. Rounds of Love

**DISCLAIMER: I own nothing**

**A/N:**_ New chapter, and like most wedding chapters need the last chapter needed a honeymoon! Hope you enjoy this! Thanks as always =)_

_**RATED M!**_

**-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- Holder of my Heart -=-=-=-=-=-=-=-**

Penelope felt the heat of the Hawaiian night as it breezed in. She went out onto the balcony and she looked at the scene in front of her. She had imagined what her honeymoon would be like, but this was exceeding her wildest dreams so much so she could very well run away and live here forever in its beauty and perfection.

"Hey Mrs Morgan," She heard Derek call up to her and she smiled to herself. _Mrs Morgan_ – that was now her title and she was going to make sure it stayed that way for life. Now that would make her idea of running away perfect. If she could have the man she loved by her side for forever and a day.

"Mrs _Mooorgan_! I think I need you," Derek called out to her again. "Like really need you!"

"I'm coming handsome," Penelope said as she left her idealistic view behind her and went after the call of her newly given name. She walked at an even pace, wondering what Derek was up to. However, walking into the living room she hadn't imagined this. Penelope couldn't stop the laughter once it started. This was not her idea of romance on a honeymoon, but it was her idea of perfected domesticated bliss in her life.

Derek stood before her in an all in one suit. He had a rose in his mouth and an adorable expression scrawled across his handsome face.

"Now that," Penelope pointed to him, running her finger metaphorically up and down his body, "That is sexy."

"Care to undress me?" Derek asked her casually. "Only it's getting a little hot in here and that could prove problematic."

Penelope gawped playfully at him, "Oh no! You might melt," Penelope fretted teasingly at him.

"Exactly," He started with a smirk, "That was my main concern."

Penelope stepped closer to him and the moment she could she pulled at the zip and revealed the velvety smooth chocolate of Derek's perfectly formed chest. She ran her newly ringed finger down his chest, biting her lip before dropping her hand and looking up at him as he remained sated.

"You're a tease," he told her as he stepped forward, not caring that they were in the living room of their honeymoon getaway. "A sexy tease at that." He then pushed her down, leaning over her to kiss her fully, his hands running her body.

Standing in front of him, his body waiting to be touch, Penelope smiled like the cat that got the canary . She had waited all day to reap the rewards of marrying the man of her dreams.

With that thought, she shook her cardigan off and allowed his hand to roam her body and reach for the zip of her dress, she allowed him to undress her as she kicked her heels off and undid the rest of the zip to his_ onsie_ and they both slowly made a physical connection by pulling closer to the other. It didn't take long for them both to head towards the bedroom, kissing, touching, arousing one another with each little lustful step.

The moment his hand ran over the lace of her bra he knew he'd hit his personal jackpot yet again. He could feel it was frilly, and he knew it would be dainty like many of the other bras he had taken off of her body in the time they had intimately involved. When he looked down her saw the baby pink of it as it sat slightly accented from her lily white skin.

He nibbled on her ear, making her head tip back, her hair falling out as she pulled the pins and multiple fastenings from it and he kissed down her neck again, kissing dead on her jugular and he could feel her pulse race through it, he could feel how alive she was in that moment.

"So beautiful," he mumbled as he finally got her on the bed and beneath him. He had taken a moment to quickly watch her as she laid on the rose petal covered bed and he knew this was going to be the wedding night of the century. He was going to make love to Penelope all through the night and even in the morning light he would worship her before falling asleep with her in his arms.

Penelope allowed him to lift her enough so he could undo her bra and she tugged down on his boxers before being allowed to remove them fully. She just licked her lips in the anticipation as he stood before her, the memory burning into her subconscious. Like many before this one.

"Yours too," Derek prompted her, and Penelope listened and as sexily as she could pulled her panties off, and from the expression on Derek's face, she'd achieved it as he came towards her and literally began to ravish her.

She felt one hand pin her by a wrist above her head while her other hand hooked onto his back, and his other hand slowly slid down her body, finding her hot centre almost immediately and already he could feel she was wet for him.

He had to smile at it; he had to love how willing she was to give her body to him. Much like he was ready to give his to hers. It was never the same either. It might have seemed like it, but to both Derek and Penelope love making was a new experience each and every time.

Penelope felt him thrust his fingers into her before removing them and repeating it and she just bit down on her lip at the pleasure she felt.

"Please," she finally gasped and looked at him, her eyes full of passion, "Derek, I need to feel you in me." She near enough begged him, "Please." She hated to beg, but he had a way to make her reach her edge way too quickly.

There had been a time when she had worried it was her that was the problem with having good love making. However, since her and Derek took the leap and became who they were today she had found out that she had never really chosen the right lover.

He continued to tease her, trying to convince himself that he could last this out. He tried to cover up Penelope's pleads with kisses, but when one please became twenty he couldn't hold out. He knew his wife's sweet force as she climaxed was going to be too much. After all, he wanted nothing more than to make sure he treated her right and kept her happy.

He couldn't last any longer, not with his want, and her pleads escalating, he needed her as much as she needed him that much was clear and he knew he couldn't deny her, or him what had been building since the moment he had watched her walk down the aisle.

So he moved so his penis was on her opening and he thrust into her, burying deep and her gasp out loud in pleasure told him the fulfilment was as much a two sided thing, his giving was being very much received and it only spurred him on for more.

Penelope felt herself, for once in her life, feel the fulfilment of good love making. This never came close to her expectations even after all this time. God did she underestimate this man too much. Everything he was giving her was gold plated with perfection and now was going to make way to creating their family.

She felt him thrust in and out and it felt so right, even though he knew she wasn't going anywhere any time soon.

She just gave herself fully to him and even when he pulled her close after, exhaustion cloaking them both heavily she was still on cloud nine.

Laying there, Penelope couldn't withhold the smile and as her left hand came to rest on her chest she caught a glimpse of her wedding rings and her smile brightened. With that glisten in her mind's eye she looked at Derek and caught her looking at him.

"Round two, Handsome?" She asked him as she rolled onto her side. "This time mamma's gonna have some fun."

Derek didn't have time to argue – _not that he would_ – as Penelope ran her hands over his naked, hot body; her leg swinging over him to straddle him ready to please him. He caught one glimpse at the look in her eyes and he knew he was going to have to up the ante in the third round.

If he had the energy that was.

**-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- Holder of my Heart -=-=-=-=-=-=-=-**


	11. When It Happens

**DISCLAIMER: I own nothing**

**A/N:**_ So stepping down from the M Rated stuff now... enjoy!_

**-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- Holder of my Heart -=-=-=-=-=-=-=-**

She knew she had been foolish to get her hopes up – _again_. Yet as Penelope looked at the negative pregnancy test in her hands she felt disheartened and as though she was the biggest failure to ever grace Derek Morgan's life.

She felt a little lost after that, and she questioned her position in Derek's life. How could she make wholly happy if she couldn't give him the one thing they both wanted so bad? She fretted that it would be cause to make a rift between them. She was scared to lose Derek when having him in her life was the most perfect thing she had to her name.

Taking a calming breath, she headed out of the bathroom and quickly threw the failed test into her suitcase before braving going downstairs.

"Want a coffee?" Fran asked as Penelope came into the kitchen and sat down at the table, "Or some tea?"

"Coffee's good," Penelope smiled at her mother and rested trying to keep a front on.

Fran forgot about the drink and sat down. She had noticed a problem with Penelope's mood the moment she had walked into the kitchen. "What's wrong, Penelope?"

Looking at her mother-in-law Penelope smiled, "Nothing."

"Don't try and lie to me," Fran replied with ease. "I know when something is bugging one of my children. Now share it." As she finished the sentence she saw Penelope's resolve disperse entirely. "Penelope?"

"I feel like maybe I'm a failure because I'm still not pregnant," Penelope admitted and looked down at her coffee, refusing to even look at her mother-in-law.

Fran slipped her hand across the table and grabbed Penelope's hand. "You look at me right now, Penelope," Fran started and slowly Penelope obliged and allowed her gaze to raise enough to look at Fran. "It'll happen, but when your body's ready."

"He wants a family so bad though, Fran and he deserves it," Penelope told her mother pained. "He really does deserve to have those children he's told me he wants and I can see it every time he sees a child or we baby sit Henry. He wants to be a dad and I'm the one that can't get pregnant. I can see he's losing hope," Penelope almost sobbed out.

Fran sat and watched Penelope cry and even as bad as it was, she couldn't help but feel a wave of relief wash over her as she realised fully that her son was more than a little loved. She was grateful that Penelope was able to gain perspective even if it was in such a hurtful way. Fran know that Penelope might well see her life potentially fall apart, but Fran knew that as far as Derek was concerned he had married Penelope because of her, not because of the children they would have.

"It's just getting harder to put on a happy face," Penelope told Fran and wiped her face in attempt to beg herself to calm down and compose herself. She knew that Derek was only at the community centre, he wasn't going to be much longer and she didn't want to be like this when he walked in.

"It'll work out fine," Fran soothed Penelope. "You'll see that, but you need to talk to Derek and get this off of your chest, Penelope, because otherwise it'll just eat you away."

Penelope nodded and smiled weakly, "I'm going to go and lay down before they get back and we head out," Penelope told Fran and stood up.

"Penelope," Fran called out and when Penelope turned back she wrapped her arms around her daughter-in-law and held her there for a moment. "It'll happen and believe me, it will be the happiest moment of your life."

"Thanks," Penelope murmured as Fran finally let her go upstairs. She sunk onto the bed the moment she had the chance and pulled Derek's pillow close. If she couldn't have him here physically, the intoxicating smell of his scent on the pillow would just have to suffice.

_Everything happened for a reason_. Penelope had to keep her faith in that alive or else she lost credibility in a lot of elements that made her life so poignant and meaningful. The reason for her parents dying when she was eighteen would be futile, getting arrested would be just another mistake, getting shot would be nothing more than the nightmare it should have been and loving Derek wouldn't hold the same worth. She refused to lose any of that.

Like Fran had said, she just had to let her body do what it needed and it would happen when it happened.

**-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- Holder of my Heart -=-=-=-=-=-=-=-**

Derek watched Penelope sleep and even though she was unaware of him, he wasn't unaware of how troubled she looked in her sleep. She might be good at putting on her best poker face but when she slept she had no control and her normal peaceful expression held all of the true raw emotions she had held in during the day.

He moved in when he watched her stretch and wake up slowly. Derek shot her a smile when he saw her try and work out his blurry form.

"Hey," Penelope managed with a stifled yawn as her eyes dropped onto the clearing view of her husband.

"Hey back," Derek told her and sat on the bed next to her. He watched as she reached for her glasses and then she settled against the pillows again. "What's up, Baby Girl?"

Penelope sniffed and knew she could go two ways with this – lie and have Derek press, or admit the truth and get the moment over with. "I took a test earlier," She told him, her tone low and quiet.

"You're pregnant?" He asked her, his excitement not withholding from his tone of voice, but his face broke as she shook her head. "You're not?"

Penelope pulled herself up from the mattress as nerves filtered her system. "I've missed a few periods and each time I suspected that maybe, I don't know, that I might be pregnant," Penelope began to feel the tears clawing at her throat and burning in her eyes. "I just never am."

"Hey, that's no big deal. We're not in a rush," Derek tried to calm her.

"You want a family, Derek. You talk about it all the time." Penelope looked at her husband with the utmost fear. She didn't want to be scared about her future with Derek. She wanted to look forward to years of flirting, of their banter. Decades of watching him age and waking her up with the same million dollar smile. She didn't want to sit and wonder when he was going to realise that being with her just wasn't going to give him what he wanted for the rest of his life. "You've dreamt of that life and the longer I take to get pregnant the more it's not going to happen. You won't wait forever."

"It's not all about that," Derek tried to tell her confidently. "There's so much more to us that just that."

"I just want to have a baby, Derek. I want to have_ your_ baby," Penelope confided in him, not caring about the tears streaming down her face. "That's all I want. That will make this all perfect."

Derek cupped her chin and made her look at him, "And it'll happen. I don't know when, but one day you'll do one of those tests and it will be positive. The more you let this bother you the more you'll stress and even I don't need to be a doctor to know what stress can do to a woman's body. I know you've probably thought it and I know you spoke to my mom and she probably told you exactly the same thing, but you just need to realise it will happen."

"And what if it doesn't happen? What then?" Penelope asked Derek fearfully. "I don't want you to leave me because I can't give you everything."

"Pen," Derek started, as he readied to finish killing her concerns. He needed her to know how he viewed their marriage and whatever happened, Penelope came first.

"I just feel like I'm letting you down," Penelope admitted and looked at him before he could speak. "Or there's something wrong with me that's going to tear us apart."

Derek felt his heart pinch that first admittance, "Baby Girl, you know there's nothing wrong with you."

"Then why aren't we pregnant?" Penelope asked Derek as though that were the only thing that was occupying her mind in life now.

"It'll happen," Derek told her and kissed her temple. "We've just got to give it time. We'll have baby soon you'll see, Princess."

Penelope relaxed at hearing those words come from Derek. She had just found her solace.

**-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- Holder of my Heart -=-=-=-=-=-=-=-**


	12. Collision of Fears

**DISCLAIMER: I own nothing**

**A/N:**_ Okay guys, I am so hoping to get this story rounded up soon! For now, have another chapter and enjoy =)_

_Thank you as always for the reviews, alerts and favourites!_

**-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- Holder of my Heart -=-=-=-=-=-=-=-**

"Talk to me oh god like one," Penelope answered the phone and smile waiting to hear her husband's voice.

"What you got?" Derek asked back tiredly.

Penelope sat up straight as that tone of her voice rang in her head. "Erm, well I've sent an address to your PDAs ready for you to go check out. That was the Unsubs last known address and I thought that you might ge-"

"Why didn't you call us when you had the address, Penelope?" Derek bit back agitatedly. "You knew it was important."

"Whoa, Mr. I-Need-To-Cool-Down, I have been running a shipload of searches and keeping on top of this for you guys. Now don't you dare ring me and start undermining me. I don't have five other people with me to split my jobs."

"You just shoulda called, Baby Girl," Derek replied as his aggression broke at that. "Got anything else?"

"Everything important I've sent through to you, Sugar Shack," Penelope replied as she finally thought that Derek's tense mood was finally passing.

"Okay, good," Derek spoke distractedly.

Penelope smiled past his snappy, annoying mood as she readied to tell him something. "I have some news," She started and felt her excitement bubble.

"I'll talk to you about it later, P. I gotta go," Derek told her and put the phone down.

"I'm pregnant," She said to the dialling tone and then took her ear piece off and lost all motivation for a moment, her excitement being killed right out.

She never thought she would feel quite so low after finding out she was pregnant.

**-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- Holder of my Heart -=-=-=-=-=-=-=-**

Derek pushed the front door open and heard a low slam. He winced as his headache didn't agree with it. He knew something major was wrong and he worried that Penelope had gotten another period seeing as her mood always darkened and everything bared the brunt of it as a result. This seemed all too familiar for him to just discount and for that he wasn't excited to be home with a pounding headache.

He decided that he couldn't leave Penelope ignored and knew if he could he would calm her down. He walked in and saw the kitchen was an absolute mess. He decided he would stand and watch her and as he did he watched her grab things for making dinner before slamming the

"You're home then," Penelope commented as she walked over to the cooking food and threw in some herbs and spices before stirring it all together aggressively. She was pissed off with waiting – waiting on getting pregnant, then waiting on seeing her husband and then to top it all she was pissed off with waiting to talk to her husband without an ounce of angst sitting between them.

"What were you trying to tell me?" Derek asked her jadedly, "Because I'm tired, Pen and I was really hoping to come home, get a shower and crawl into bed."

"I was trying to tell you something really important, but because you were stressing you shut down on me so you can wait!" Penelope yelled at him forcefully and she hated the rushes of hormones that triggered the instant reaction of tears. "You haven't done that in over a year and three cases consecutively you've done just that!"

"That's because the moment we get off a case we're back on one!" Derek argued back, "It's constant."

Penelope threw her arms up in the air, "Yeah, course I don't understand that do I?" She asked him in a heated sarcastic tone. "Hey, I'm just the team's tech. I have the easy life obviously."

Running a hand over his face, Derek felt agitation rise in him. "I never said that. You're just putting words into my mouth now, Baby Girl," Derek said back defensively.

"Well this time was different," Penelope said with a sad sigh. "I am not just your best friend anymore Derek. We took vows, I'm a constant in your life and when you just put the phone down on me, or snap at me when it affects me more."

"Just stop, Pen," Derek interrupted her. "I'm going for a shower. We'll discuss this later," Derek murmured as he realised that the more they stood and did this the more likely he was to snap and he was not going to do that to Penelope so he turned and left.

"That's it," Penelope shouted behind him as she went and grabbed her car keys – the food going forgotten, "just go upstairs."

Derek turned to go back to her, but before he even made it to the bottom of the stairs she was gone, totally ignoring the calls of her name that he had shouted as he rushed back to her. Now his wife had gone out in a mess and he was left to wait on her to come home.

Heading upstairs he knew he needed a shower, something to revitalise him. He knew once he had had a shower he would be refreshed and his stress would be gone and he could go find him his wife, but that all changed once he had gotten into the bathroom.

"Shit," He muttered as he saw the pregnancy test in the bin. He leaned down and picked it up and he didn't need instructions to know what a positive pregnancy test looked like – he had seen enough negative tests in the past few months. His wife had been trying to tell him she was pregnant and he had blocked her out.

Had she been trying to tell him she was pregnant all along and he had literally been heartless and not heard the urgency in her voice? Thinking back, he realised he had, but he had chosen to ignore it because he wanted to deal with the case and get home. He still felt like Strauss was ready to exact revenge on them for getting married and breaking frat rules and so he had wanted to keep personal and professional issues entirely separate. Now he really was the bad guy.

He forgot about taking a shower and ran and jumped in his car and knew exactly where she was. She was in the park, the part with the large lake, the place they had gotten married in months ago. He wasted no time in hesitating. It was his favourite thinking place and so he had no doubt it was Penelope's too.

He didn't say word when he saw her sitting looking out at the lake. He just sat next to her and waited for her to speak.

"I need a new getaway," She mumbled unimpressed that he had found her so quickly. This had been the one place she had gone to whilst her mind was in auto-pilot.

"No you don't," Derek told her and then put his hand into hers, "You should have rang me and rang me until I listened to you tell me you were pregnant."

Penelope shrugged, "Your mind was otherwise occupied."

"It wasn't at you, y'know?" Derek replied honestly.

Standing at that, Penelope needed to pace, "Wasn't at me? You've been snapping at me for weeks, taking things out on me during cases. Making _me_ feel like I've done something wrong – that makes it aimed at me."

"I promise you it won't happen again, Baby Girl," Derek apologised in that sentence and he did mean it. He wouldn't let a case get between them again. He stood to stop her from pacing.

"Don't promise me that you're not going to do the same when you can't keep that! I know you, Derek and when a case gets heavy so does your mood. I get that, I do, but don't promise me you won't take it out on me and you won't hit out when we both know that's what you do best."

Derek looked away ashamed as she admitted that to him. He felt like he had let her down by not being able to make such a simple promise.

"I try to be understanding, but me telling you I was pregnant was the most exciting news I had and you shot me down. I went to just blurt it out to you before you went, but the line was already dead."

"I am so unbelievably sorry, Baby Girl," Derek told her as he stepped a little closer to her. "It wasn't ever my intention."

"I know," Penelope told him in a low tone. "I just don't want to become like Hotch and Haley did, Derek," Penelope half sobbed at him. "I don't want to end up like that and we are heading there sooner than I wanted to believe we ever would."

"We aren't going to become that," Derek confessed, scared of the prospect. "We won't be that."

"How can you say that?" Penelope asked him, "We're drowning in case after case and there is no way I'm ever going to ask you to quit on a job that you love. I am not going to be that type of wife."

"Maybe you need to be," Derek said as he took her hands in his. "I don't want you to ever think I love a job more than you, Pen. _Ever_. There are other careers, but there is only one you."

Penelope closed her eyes, but she opened then when she felt Derek put his hand to her chin and lift her head, "What about this baby? I want it to have its dad, Derek, but that requires pressuring you and that's not how we work."

"Like I said, Princess, there are other careers. As long as I'm fighting back I'm keeping me happy, but I refuse to fight with you when your smile is the one that gets me through my day I think a career change is the least of my worries." Derek told her forcefully, "I'm sorry, Baby. Really, _really_ sorry."

"I love you, Derek," Penelope whispered as she finally felt complete again.

"And I love you," He replied and smiled at her brightly. "I can't believe you're pregnant," Derek told Penelope and felt every bit of stress disperse as he felt the happiness and fulfilment sink in. It was then he realised that Penelope finally looked fully happy at being able to give him literally everything. "This is way too much to get used to!"

"You've got another six and half months to get used to the idea," Penelope told him as she watched how happy he was by the news. "I'm surprised you haven't called the loony bin on me and they're not on the way with butterfly nets with my mood swings the past few months," Penelope tried to make light of the situation.

"I think I've dealt long enough with your insanity to dare get you admitted. Plus my life would be so boring," Derek teased her as pulled her close and wrapped his arms around her waist. "I'm sorry for being such an ass to you."

"It's not all you, Handsome. I'm hormonal," Penelope countered, "And I just miss you."

"Good I'm home now then," He said and moved in for a kiss. The moment Penelope deepened it he knew he had some life choices to make or he would really miss out on what mad his life perfect.

The prospect of giving it all up didn't worry him.

The prospect of losing it all did.

**-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- Holder of my Heart -=-=-=-=-=-=-=-**


	13. Using Your Spare Time Wisely

**DISCLAIMER: I own nothing**

**A/N:**_ Another daily update! Thanks as always! =)_

**-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- Holder of my Heart -=-=-=-=-=-=-=-**

Penelope breathed as she settled down. She was exhausted and after a two hour drive her stomach wasn't dealing with that and a random bout of morning sickness. She had come to realise that since falling pregnant she had no stomach for backseat driving and she was relieved to finally be home from training a truck load of wasteful potential FBI techs.

She had seen that Derek was still asleep and she hoped she could just slip into the bathroom and rest until she felt better. Falling back so she was sitting with her back flush to the cool wall she shut her eyes and breathed evenly and clearly. It didn't work for long as she felt the familiar rush of morning sickness in all its glory albeit not as bad as it used to be in her first trimester.

"Baby?" Derek said sleepily as he leant against the doorframe trying to catch himself. He was worried that she was throwing up still at over seven months pregnant. It was either passing morning sickness or she was ill. If that was the case, he was hoping it was the morning sickness.

Penelope wiped her mouth and looked up at him with a small smile, "Hey Baby Boy. Did I wake you?"

"No," He lied and stepped in, his feet hitting the tiling heavily with the last of his slumber. "You okay?"

She nodded, but could not deny the queasiness of her stomach. "That drive was lethal," She told him and didn't want to get into too many details. "That and no sleep," She rested then, finally feeling calm enough to contemplate moving. Yet when she did, she felt her stomach flip and she paused and put her head back, her hand soothing the baby in her stomach.

"Want me to get something to settle your stomach and then you get some sleep, Gorgeous?" Derek asked her as he ran the cold tap, getting a glass he filled it and passed it down to Penelope. "Remember drink it slow."

"Thanks handsome," Penelope replied as she reached up. "I've think I'm okay."

Derek got down with her on the cool flooring. He had truly missed her in the week she had been gone. "How are my wife and son doing?" Derek asked concerned and lovingly.

"We're doing superb, Hot Stuff. We're just ready to stuff our faces and then find a bed," Penelope mused lightly as she looked at him. She took another bit of the water and felt normalcy setting into her system.

"Guess I'm going to be cooking up a feast of a breakfast then," Derek teased her lightly.

Penelope allowed him to help her up, "Let me help."

Shaking his head, Derek took her to the bedroom and sat her on the bed, "Let me go and put something on and I'll be right back up. You can help by giving me a good morning." He kissed her lightly and then left her.

Getting up, Penelope decided to go and find her husband downstairs and disobey him. She threw off her cardigan as she went and made the walk onto the landing, but halted when she got to the room that was designated for their baby. She pushed the door open, her and Derek had decided to put their plans into action when she got back and she was ready to put her visualisations into plans.

Except when she opened the door fully, her dreams and ideas were made a reality.

Penelope walked into the room, her eyes wide, her lips parted in silent shock. She could smell the freshness of paint, feel the softness of the freshly laid cream carpet beneath her feet and she could smell the newly varnished wood of the crib and matching furniture.

She felt her heart gallop as she ran her palm across the painted white wood of the crib and she looked in at the ready made bed. She then set her gaze on the almost white armchair readied with pillows shaped like a variety of sports balls. Set on the dresser on the side, Penelope had to smile, was a picture of Derek when he had found out he had a talent for playing football. Penelope smiled even brighter as the slight bit of hope entered her system that her son would grow up to enjoy a sport as much as their father did.

Left so mesmerised, Penelope didn't take any notice of the Derek coming back up the stairs to find her. Nor did she notice him walk past the room only to come back after noticing her standing in the nursery and not the bedroom.

"So you like?" Derek asked as he found her in the nursery.

Penelope smiled wistfully as she felt him move in behind her. "When did you do this?" Penelope asked as Derek came into the room and looped his strong arms around her waist, kissing her neck as he pulled their bodies together. She didn't answer his question; her shock was preventing her from doing so.

"You've been gone a week, Princess. I had to put my new working life to good measure," Derek told her sarcastically. Since Penelope's twelve week scan he had made the executive decision to half his work load with the BAU in order to be home more for Penelope. He had seen the dissolution of the best thing in his life and it had terrified him and he would make a compromise with the devil if he so had to, to keep this life as it were. He should have known that his devil would come in the form of Strauss, but for once he was appreciative of the deal they had struck up between them and he was even happier with the results months on.

Now Derek worked on renovating houses to bring in the extra money and he and Penelope's relationship was stronger and more enduring than ever before. Now they got to enjoy her pregnancy much more than before. They didn't snap at one another when cases got too much.

Especially since Penelope did a lot more working from home. She was reprimanded by many agencies, companies, businesses and so finding other work to sit alongside her broken down BAU work wasn't difficult. She now got to create new programmes within days and get paid big bucks for them. That was a lifestyle she wasn't going to give up in a hurry if it meant she saw her husband more than ever and still got to sit pretty financially.

"You definitely do put your free time to excellent use," Penelope admitted and then manoeuvred her head so she could kiss him whilst they still stood chest to back. "Plus, mamma's feeling really, really neglected and in need for some fulfilment so you might well some appreciation later tonight."

"Someone's horny," Derek mused teasingly as Penelope looked back.

"I'm always horny," Penelope replied quite satisfied with the fact. "But then again, with you as my husband I don't get much option other than to be horny."

Derek chuckled at that, "Well it's just how I like it." Derek turned her in his arms and gazed at her expectantly, "So do you like what I did with the place or not?"

"No, I don't like it," Penelope teased him. "I love it," Penelope admitted exuberantly. "Thank you for doing this, Handsome."

"Gotta put my skills to good use when some get neglected," He told her with a slight pout. "You know when you're away I get more done than ever before."

Penelope giggled at that, "Is that so?" She asked him and tilted her head at him. "Well then next time you can give the bathroom a good clean."

Letting his jaw drop, Derek looked at her in disbelief before faltering into a smile. "What about we make that your next job, Baby Girl?"

"Mine? You'd make your coming on eight month pregnant wife do the cleaning?" Penelope

Derek allowed his mouth to curl into a cheeky grin as he thought of his comeback instantly, "It's called nesting isn't it?"

Punching Derek in the arm playfully, she giggled, "You're so mean."

"You love it," Derek told her knowingly and looked around the room, "Right, anything you want to add or change?"

Shaking her head, Penelope smiled at the perfection of the room. "I think we're nearly ready," Penelope mused to him and then she gave that a second thought. "Actually," She said as she put her arms around his neck, "All fears aside, I know we're ready."

It didn't matter about the bump growing in front of her, or the continual monthly scans. Standing here in the complete nursery, that was now ready for their son, made reality settle in.

**-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- Holder of my Heart -=-=-=-=-=-=-=-**


	14. Captured Attention

**DISCLAIMER: I own nothing**

**A/N:**_ Well, there are only three chapters left of this... you'll understand why with the last chapter! Cannot believe it's another story almost done! However, for now, enjoy this chapter! =)_

**-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- Holder of my Heart -=-=-=-=-=-=-=-**

"He's definitely got his daddy's dimples," Penelope mused as she stared at her newborn son as he slept away in her arms. She knew Derek was walking in without having to look up and she was in the presence of the two most amazing men in her life.

Derek smiled as he watched be attentive, "Ah well, they are a family heirloom after all, Baby Girl. It's only fair that my son turns out just as handsome as his father."

Raising her gaze, Penelope looked at Derek bemused, "Is that so, my chocolate Adonis?"

"Really is," Derek told her, "Just like our daughter is going to be gorgeous just like her mamma."

Feeling a blush, Penelope's smile tightened as she thought to how life could have been had she not been given perfection in its most vivid form. "Do you ever wonder how life could have been?" Penelope asked as she rocked her son as she sat in the large armchair. Running her finger around his tiny face, she tore her attention away and looked up at Derek. "I mean in terms of finding love, having a family. I mean anything could have happened that could have prevented this."

Penelope hadn't told Derek that her mind was still reeling since the birth of their son only eight days earlier. She thought to the what if's in her life, it was hard not to ply the contrasts onto her life when she had the extremely good life.

She thought about what if Battle had turned out to be a genuinely good guy, who wanted more than to put a piece of metal in her. She thought to Kevin and to whether or not he could have been _the _one that had won her other and not Derek. Her thoughts darkened as she thought to Tamara, or any of the other women that had vied for Derek's attention.

"I do," Derek's voice broke into her thoughts as she continued to fall into the depth of badness. "Then I looked at the woman that said 'I do' and she smiles brightly at me and I see that seductive twinkle in her eye and I know, I just know, I had my pick of women and I made the right choice." Derek told her honestly, his tone almost dipping into a dreamy tone. "I love you, Pen and it doesn't matter who walks in or out of my life, it is always you that is on my mind. You and TJ," Derek finished and pulled the blanket down a little to look at his son.

Penelope watched the way Derek looked at their son and she had to appreciate this. That look, the one where his eyes gazed in idolisation and he left earth for a moment was the same one he had given her when she accepted his proposal. The same look she had seen as she walked down the aisle in the park that summer's day and it was the same look he gave the moment she held their son for the first time. It was look she hoped she could help evoke in him for years to come.

"When I think of the man of my dreams, he is the only man that I can imagine growing old with and it's always you," Penelope admitted softly. "When I'm old and forgetful I know you'll be the man that will retell me what happened to make us fall in love and I'll fall in love all over again." She smiled at him then, "You going to retell our love story if I need it?" Penelope asked him pointedly.

Derek crouched down in front of his wife and son and looked at Penelope intently, "I would retell you daily if I ever had to," He vowed, "I would repeat it to you and make you fall in love with me every day of our lives if it comes to it."

"You are definitely a keeper," She said teasingly and looked down as her son began to wake up. "I think you need a cuddle with your son, Handsome." She began to move and could sense Derek about to argue that she should stay put, "I really need to pee."

"Ah right," He said and stood up only to take his son from his wife arms and allowed her to get up. He quickly took her place and could feel the warmth her body had left behind. He settled down, soothing his son as he went.

Penelope stood in the doorway, her body pressed to the door frame as she looked in at the sight in front of her. It was by far one of her favourite sights to ever be given. The father-son moments were her favourites for intent and purposes.

She left the pair behind her with a bright smile - She loved this life.

**-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- Holder of my Heart -=-=-=-=-=-=-=-**

Penelope curled her feet up and under her as she settled in the armchair. She finally felt like she had a break in her day as TJ finally slept lengthy time slots and allowed her to actually breathe. She pulled her glasses off and closed her eyes for a second.

"You looked whacked, PG," Emily commented as she looked over at her friend.

Running a hand over her face, Penelope tried to wake up a little more and smiled, "Called being a mom, EP." Penelope told Emily truthfully and saw her friend begin to fret, "But believe me, Spencer won't let you down. He's like my Derek. They're both very capable, hands on men," She winked and put her glasses back on. "Derek being away when TJ's teething is just hard."

"Not sleeping?"

Penelope shook her head, "It's not been too bad, Derek's been up when I've been up practically so he's been on cam with me. I just need a break," Penelope mused with a light laugh. "More than a few hours sleep would be good."

"You could ask us to babysit," Emily offered as a solution and liked the idea as she offered. "Call it experience."

"Trust me, you do not want experience," Penelope replied genuinely. "I would have avoided going into labour at all costs had I had hands on experience like that. I'm not even joking. It would have scared the heebie jeebies out of me. Really, it's not TJ."

Emily laughed at that, "Okay well... Is it that you're just you're missing your husband?" She assumed as she thought about it and realised that Penelope wasn't actually struggling with motherhood at all.

"Too much," Penelope replied sweetly. "I should understand the job and I do, I know I do, but since TJ's been born it's a lot harder. I don't want to scare you, Em, but I think I might go insane if I don't get this out."

"You tell me then," Emily replied. "I wouldn't be a good friend if I couldn't deal." She told Penelope and shifted to show she had her whole attention on Penelope. "Plus, you forget I'm the one that compartmentalises the best out of the team."

"I know, but c'mon, you're eight months pregnant and your husband's in the same law enforcement job as me," Penelope tried to deter the conversation away from admitting this.

"Talk." Was all Emily said and she used a stern tone of voice. She raised an eyebrow at Penelope, "Now, PG or I will use force."

Sighing, Penelope sighed – it was either that or feel the wrath of Emily. "I just miss him. I get too used to him being home so when he does go away it feels like years."

"Is that it?" Emily asked as she saw Penelope's mood change briefly. She could see Penelope was too exhausted to be probed when it was obvious she didn't want to get everything off of her chest so Emily refused to push. So she relented and waited for Penelope to take the opportunity to lie and move their conversation onwards and upwards.

"Yes thanks, Sweetie," Penelope nodded and then stood up. "Want a drink?" Penelope asked and Emily nodded, "I'll be right back." She got up and rushed into the kitchen and the sinking feeling of loneliness hit her. She was missing her husband far too much for her liking and she hated the abandonment she felt as a result. Getting a drink was just a reason for her to shake the feeling and remember that Derek would be home before she knew it.

Walking into the house, Derek shut the door and could hear Penelope and Emily talking. He crept in and put his finger to his lips as he found Emily relaxing on the couch, her hand coursing over her pregnancy bump. He smirked and crept past and stood in the doorway casually.

"Hey Baby Girl," He called out to her.

Penelope looked up at Derek and smiled as she stood in their kitchen looking at him in shock. She hadn't known he had come home and here he was, "Hey Handsome."

"C'mere," Derek said as he looped his arms around Penelope and pulled her close, he leant in and kissed her, "I've missed you so much."

"Mm," Penelope managed in response as Derek kissed her again, showing full well just how much he had missed her in the duration of the case.

"Put your wife down, Morgan!" Emily yelled out at the pair. "I can see _every_thing!"

Not listening, Derek bent his wife down, holding her to support her and he kissed her romantically and dramatically in the middle of their kitchen awarding them a groan of disagreement.

Penelope might now have two holders of her hearts, but one of them still loved to make her feel insanely in love at every given opportunity.

**-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- Holder of my Heart -=-=-=-=-=-=-=-**


	15. Surpising Still

**DISCLAIMER: I own nothing**

**A/N:**_ So nearing the end! Thank you for all of you who are still following! I hope you like what's to come!_

**_Rated M! _**

**-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- Holder of my Heart -=-=-=-=-=-=-=-**

"Happy Anniversary, Baby Girl!" Derek exclaimed as he stretched his arm out to put around her shoulder and pull her close as he looked around the French airport. He then looked at her, "I decided that I'd bring you to a place where I'd have to hear you speak the French lingo repetitively for an entire week."

Penelope turned to Derek, a slick, seductive – if not exhausted – grin on her lips. "Je vous aimerai à jamais, mon Mari."

"Mm," Derek moaned as he put his arms onto her shoulders and looped them to keep her close. "Just like that."

"I know how to keep my husband happy, and seeing as it's our wedding anniversary and we're two years down the line, I think I should do everything I can to appreciate the man that stole my heart."

Derek couldn't withhold his goofy smirk as that looped into his mind, "God I love you, Pen."

"I love you too," Penelope said even though she knew that she didn't need to return the account of love for Derek to know. "I am so looking forward to this week with just you – no cases, no TJ, no interruptions."

Winking at her, he grinned hoping she would be on the same wave length. "So," Derek started as he looked around for a cab, "Any _preliminary_ plans?"

Looking at him in complete wonderment, she grinned, "Well... There's the Arc de Triomphe, Le Louvre, oh! The Eiffel Tower, Handsome!"

Leaning down, Derek didn't intend to burst her bubble; he just intended to incorporate more _animalistic_ ideas. "I had more ideas for inside," Derek almost said in a low growl and seductive into her ear.

Penelope shrugged then, "I have a feeling we won't be seeing much of the French outdoors."

"I think that means we need to check in," Derek said and pinched Penelope's butt to show how they needed to get to their hotel.

"Naughty boy," Penelope looked at him; she winked and then stepped forward, put her fingers to her lips and hailed a cab.

They meant business after all.

**-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- Holder of my Heart -=-=-=-=-=-=-=-**

It wasn't long before the temperature seemed to take a step up from the natural French air and the minimal clothing they were in began to be lost into heaps on the floor, new covers on lamps and chairs and any other available edge in the hotel room. Derek pulling Penelope's top of effortless, losing his slacks to the floor, pulling her free of her dress.

"Tell me what you want, Penelope, and I'll give you it," Derek asked as he prepared to push her onto the mattress.

Ignoring him for a moment, kissing him was a priority, getting more of his taste on her lips had taken over and she stalled for a second. "You," was the simplest and most honest answer she could give him.

There was no other answer.

With that said he pushed her down and fell down with her. Towering over her, he found that it didn't take long for his wandering hand to slip down her perfectly smooth skin, gaining access under her panties and feeling just how wet and ready she was for him. Smirking, he quickly removed her yellow coloured panties and got rid of his own boxers.

"You best be ready, Sweet Thing," He said as he allowed her to move up the bed and he remained at her lower body. He gave her look, a glint in his eyes before he went down on.

Penelope felt her overwhelming drive for Derek's loving go into overdrive – something that always, always shocked her. Here she was, him kissing her body, leaving love bites where he so wanted and all she could do was feel dominated and a prisoner to wanting more.

She felt him rise up over her navel, kissing near her belly button. He continued to go up, spending longer on her breasts. Kissing her rosy nipples, cupping her full breasts and as he heard her mood her moan out loud he knew that was a noise that broke his resolve. He always silently vowed to himself every time that he would make her wait, he would torture her with the foreplay, but it never worked.

Penelope broke him every _damn_ time.

Moving up, Derek reached her mouth after dotting kisses over her entire body and he suddenly felt Penelope's arms circle his neck and pull him down allowing her to kiss him in return. She deepened the kiss, intensifying their lust once again.

Derek found that he didn't need continual sexual gratification to know he was loved. Penelope's kisses were enough for Derek to know that he had captured a heart enough to seize it and hold it captive with love alone. He didn't have to strife for Penelope to continue to be interested – she just was and she made it glaringly obvious that she would be for life.

Standing briefly, Derek looked down at her as she lay on the bed, her eyes so heavily hooded with lust and want, her body seemingly radiating with the same emotions. He smirked again, and then went down on her, putting his chest to hers as he kissed her and a hand went down to her red hot centre. He teased her, he tricked her, he made her body ache for more. He made her moan out, made her back arch, made her quiver beneath him.

"Please," She whispered between the kisses and pecks and the little bites. Her voice was now low in her pleasured state, "Please, Derek, I need you." She spoke with such desire and when she looked at him before kissing him he knew he was exacting torture on her body right at that moment. "Please."

Hearing her beg in such a low whisper tippled him, he was going to wait like he had decided (_again_), he was going to draw out the torture, tease her a little more, enjoy the foreplay, but he was past wasting moments when the moment was upon them. His body didn't have the same self control that it once did.

He parted her legs a little more, slotting himself between them perfectly, the tip of penis on her opening, the warmth even more palpable than before and he knew it would be red hot when he penetrated her to give her – and himself – a sense of euphoria.

"Please," She begged him again, she needed him now and he just listened to the plea and pushed his more than ready penis into her. Feeling an immediate connection and filling a temporary void all at once.

Penelope felt him thrust into her over and over again and nothing quite came close to the feel of it. There was something so pure about Derek whenever he made love to her. Something different and so right about it. It was something she wanted to feel for life regardless.

She could call it just sex, or she could call it true love, but whatever it was it was divine perfection and it was all hers to keep.

There was no better physical act that matched this and she knew that this wasn't it for the day – or week for that matter.

Derek listened to her moan his name as the orgasm hit her, as the ecstasy and pleasure rippled throughout her entire body and he felt spurred on rather than seeing it as the end of this moment. He never took to ending too soon and even when he felt himself release he refused to stop until Penelope made the signs that she was ready for a break.

_Which wasn't often._

It wasn't until Penelope's hand loosened from his shoulder that he collapsed against her chest, both their breathings racing and heated, the kisses still be delivered delicately. He cradled her as he pulled out slowly, readying for the rest that was about to fall between them.

"You do it every time," Penelope panted as Derek fell down next to her.

"Do what?" Derek asked her with a cocked brow.

Looking at him, "Surprise me that's what. My body should so be used to it, to you." She rolled onto her side and spooned next to him, "But it isn't."

She finished and closed her eyes, kissing his chest gently before snuggling in closer.

Derek smirked, he loved that one factor.

**-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- Holder of my Heart -=-=-=-=-=-=-=-**

A little while later, they lay sated, hot and completely in love – as if that were difficult. This was one of their favourite moments, the smell of sex lingering over them, the air still dense with heat and they were so spent that laying with legs tangled, bodies joint in a cuddle was a form of flawlessness in itself.

"So we have little Thomas James. Our little TJ," Penelope started to ponder as she ran circles around Derek's chest, "What are we thinking for child number two?" She then moved so she was looking up at him, "Any initialled names that come to mind?"

Derek looked up at the ceiling thoughtfully, "I really like the name Alexandra for a little girl." He mused to his wife, "Alexandra Jennifer Morgan. AJ Morgan."

"What about Emily?" Penelope asked with a slight pout over leaving Emily out.

Smiling, Derek knew he had this solved, "Who said I was rooting for just one daughter?"

"That's what I was hoping you'd say," Penelope replied and then laid her hand to his chest and looked at her rings as they sat on her finger so prominently. She didn't even realise she had sighed, but she knew Derek had when he quickly spoke.

"You okay, Princess?" Derek asked Penelope and put his hand to her chin to make her look up at him. He watched her try to hide her feelings, but she failed.

"I miss our baby," Penelope replied to him. "I thought when he got past the first birthday it would be easier. I just miss him that's all."

"Baby Girl, this is time for us to recoup and celebrate the life we have. I am not saying that I don't miss TJ because I do, just as much as when I'm on a case, but sometimes the break makes me realise just how much I want this life and love this life and want this life." He moved a curl back and smiled. "He'll be back in your arms before you know it, but for now you need to enjoy some well deserved time off."

"You're right," Penelope sighed and rested back to lay her head on Derek's chest.

Revelling in the moment, Derek twirled one of Penelope's curls in his fingers and smiled. He felt like the luckiest man to walk this earth. He had a wife, a child and the most prospective future ahead of him and to make it even better? He had six more days until they were needed back in Virginia.

Penelope moved so she was sitting up a little more, she went to look at him. She ran her hand up his bicep, feeling the perfection contour of his muscles. "God you're chocolate perfection." She admitted and realised that she could sit and dwell about her separation from her son, or she could appreciate these days without disruption – she knew that if she dwelled on the missing part then this week would drag and be boring, but if she loved it and loved Derek, she would be left fulfilled as always and have her son in her arms before she knew it.

Derek chuckled, "Mmm," He said after she kissed his bare chest, lingering to dot like he had earlier when he had worshipped her body. "And girl don't I love me some white chocolate."

Penelope giggled at him, and just looked at him, deep into his eyes and settled with a smile on her face. "You do not know how much I want you right now. How much I _always_ want you."

Derek cleared his throat, "Hang on a moment," He told her and shifted and then shot her a cheeky grin as his erection became more known as it hit her inner thigh more under the sheet. "Does that show that we're on the same level?"

"Oh," Penelope said as her face illuminated in a massive grin, "This is just asking for round two."

"Like you needed to ask," Derek replied to her with a slick smirk on his lips.

"Exactly," Penelope retorted as she eyed him up and then slowly sank down the bed.

Derek put his hand behind his head as his wife did all the work this time.

This was time well spent.

They just never thought she would spend the following five days of vacation would be spent in the one bed, only leaving to use the bathroom and accept room service.

For once her and Derek were making this time all about them.

**-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- Holder of my Heart -=-=-=-=-=-=-=-**


	16. Something To Tell You

**DISCLAIMER: I own nothing**

**A/N:**_ Right, shorter chapter here guys! Enjoy and I'll see you in the last chapter! =)_

**-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- Holder of my Heart -=-=-=-=-=-=-=-**

Penelope was thankful for JJ offering to keep TJ at hers whilst she went to find Derek at one of his properties. She knew he was going to two today and she didn't know which one was this morning and which one was this afternoon. Driving she couldn't keep the memories flowing freely in her mind and as she got closer to the first house she felt the nerves and butterflies begin to build.

Pulling up into the properties drive she didn't see Derek's SUV nor could she make out any lights on. Shifting Esther into reverse she backed out and then headed off to the second house. She had the music on loud, her mood was too good to care that she had wasted nearly half an hour going to an empty house.

Her stomach churned the nerves as she saw Derek's SUV as she drew closer and closer to the house and she wiped the smile off of her face and put on her best poker face. Parking up, she got out grabbing her bag and fiddled to find the right key. Opening the door she could smell the fresh smell of paint and followed the music that was playing.

Standing in the large archway Penelope watched as Derek paint the wall. She could see his white t-shirt lifting to reveal the contours of his lower back muscles and she could see his boxers poking out, the Calvin Klein trademark name showing.

She knew she could stand and watch him, but some things were not left for waiting.

"Hey Stud," She called out to him and when he turned he smirked.

"Hey Baby Girl, how was the doctors?" He asked her and the worry melted into his eyes. "Everything okay?"

She stepped into the room taking her shoes off, "They found something." She began with a low, whispered tone, "Just a _little_ something."

"Pen..." Derek started; dread filtering into his voice immediately.

Looking up at him she could see the concern infused to his expression. "Put the paintbrush down Handsome, I have some news."

Derek listened and watched her with alarming concern.

Penelope couldn't draw this out any longer she near enough ran at him and kissed him, he hitched her up so he was carrying her and she was wrapped around him. Again he felt the weight loss and worried, but Penelope didn't relent on the kisses for the moment, "I'm pregnant." She told him between kisses, "We're pregnant, Hubby. Well and truly pregnant. Again." She finished with and pulled away excitedly. She had wanted to tell him, but she wanted to appreciate him, for giving her life again.

Shock registered first before any other emotion hit him. "How far gone are you?" Derek asked her, he wanted all details after he kicked himself for letting her go to the doctors alone.

"I've got a scan in a couple of days to determine for sure, but so far it's looking like we're three and half months, Sugar." She looked up to her husband and smiled brightly, "If we ever need to get pregnant repeating our anniversary is the perfect way."

"Believe me," Derek said, "I am always more than up for that, Princess." Derek's thoughts then turned as he pieced it all together. "Hang on."

"I am," Penelope pointed out sarcastically as they still stood with her being cradle by Derek, her legs around his waist, her arms around his neck, the wet paint sticking to her.

Chuckling Derek spoke, "The weight loss? The cravings? The fainting? You knew?" Derek asked her as he held her, his hands on her butt, her legs wrapped around his waist. "You knew you were pregnant didn't you?"

"_Maaaybe_," Penelope chimed at him happily.

"Woman! I could murder you sometimes!" Derek chided with playful chagrin. "But God I love you."

"That's good," Penelope said as she leaned down and kissed him and she felt the butterflies in her stomach like she always had. "I love you, Derek Morgan and I love you, TJ and our little Morgan."

"I think we've got AJ on the way," He prompted as he went for smaller kisses.

Smiling at the thought she kissed him again, a weakening kiss full of power and passion, love and devotion. One that rendered them both powerless to one another. Slowly Derek lowered them to ground, his arms cradling her still as they reached the floor. He kissed her his way that time and Penelope didn't take long to follow suit and respond.

Pulling back, Derek grinned at her cheekily as he looked up at the wall and then down at her. "I've got to repaint that wall now," Derek reminded her and he watched her giggle. "And you're helping."

"Deal," She told him and pulled him down on top of her. "Right about now, Hot Stuff, we have other _pressing_ matters," She pointed out as she could feel his erection against her leg.

The wall could wait, she wanted her husband.

**-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- Holder of my Heart -=-=-=-=-=-=-=-**

Hours later the pair lay naked and wrapped in paint mottled sheet that was laid down to protect the flooring, both spent and complete. It was like a repeat of their anniversary entwined with a celebration of their little family they were making.

Penelope sighed contently as she thought to how different this was to when TJ was conceived. Derek and Penelope had fallen out and she had felt like her life was falling down around her, now she was a firm believer that it would take a mighty strength to tear this world down now.

"Really doesn't get old," Derek commented as he looked up at the ceiling.

"What doesn't?" Penelope asked him as she remained still.

Derek moved to kiss the top of her head, "This life. The whole of it. Everything."

"Handsome, this is here for life. Me and TJ aren't going anywhere and if we are, it certainly isn't without you," Penelope told him as she thought about how right their life was now.

"I really picked the right life," Derek mentioned as he thought over all of his life choices. Picking to tell Penelope was definitely the best option he had ever made and he revelled in it every day he woke up with her next to him.

Penelope sighed happily again as that was said, "Well at least we can say that was easier the second time round. Think what third time round will be like." Penelope mentioned as she thought back across the weeklong vacation that her and Derek had been granted. She had taken over a year to fall pregnant with TJ and now here they were, when they weren't really trying, pregnant after a five day escapade.

"Five days straight in bed does that to a woman. Next time we'll make it ten days," Derek teased her as they lay amongst the wet paint and broken furniture.

Penelope smiled dreamily as she thought back, "We've got a couple of hours top right now," She looked at him, "and I'm horny as hell, Handsome."

Rolling her over, he looked down at her, "Best use this time wisely."

It didn't take long for ecstasy to take over the pair.

Just how it seemed to every day and how it would for the rest of their days.

**-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- Holder of my Heart -=-=-=-=-=-=-=-**


	17. Perfected Ending

**DISCLAIMER: I own nothing**

**A/N:**_ Last chapter! =( I want to thank everyone who took the time to leave amazing reviews, and to those who read, alerted and favourite! _

_I hope you like the last chapter..._

**-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- Holder of my Heart -=-=-=-=-=-=-=-**

"Who are you?" Penelope asked, intercepting the story. She looked at the aging man in front of her, a look of complete loss on her face.

Derek smiled and put his hand out to her, "Derek Morgan." He had been here before. Halfway into the love story when Penelope would suddenly interrupt asking him who he was, or where she was. It was almost routine.

He had vowed to retell her their love story if ever the day came to it and here they were - Penelope's memory resetting itself and him having to share everything they had built up to make their happily ever after.

Not that he argued or got bored. He fell in love with their story every time he did this. This time he had gotten further than ever before. He had managed to tell her about the day they had conceived the baby that they later found out to be their daughter, AJ, just like they had predicted.

The one thing he hated nowadays was the blankness to Penelope's face and the way she looked like she knew him, but in actual fact, she didn't have a clue. It was little triggers that made him think she was still in there, remembering, knowing, loving.

He watched her face light up at his introduction and for a moment he could believe that his wife knew who he was, but he knew the drill.

"My husband's called Derek," She told him enthusiastically. "He should be here soon. I've been waiting."

"How long?" He asked and he saw another smile ignite upon her face, a coy one. "Well, Baby Girl?" He asked and watched her face light up even more.

"Baby Girl," she said dreamily distracted, "I always remembered that he always called me that. More than my name you know that?" She asked him.

It was almost like they were in a time warp. All of her memories were there of their life, but she told them to him as though he were a stranger. Not the man that had lived half of the love story with her.

Either that or he had to tell her as though he were reading a book.

"He always left me waiting too long," She said dreamily, and then brought her attention back to him. "He knew how impatient I'd get and he'd always keep me waiting just so he'd reap the punishment. He always enjoyed that too much." She smiled at him, "Come to think of it, you look a lot alike."

"Do we really, Goddess?" Derek said and he felt the familiar pangs in his heart at her oblivious behaviour. The sting wasn't quite as bad as it had been in the beginning of her diagnosis, but losing Penelope to a disease was not his idea of a happy ending. Dementia was not supposed to be written into dialogue or narrative of this love story.

However, that didn't stop him from retelling her all of their countless stories of their long lives together just as he had promised her.

"I'll be back in a moment," He told her and stood to leave after she gave him a head shake to him being a dead ringer of her husband.

Penelope didn't even answer him or acknowledge him leaving. She was literally in her own little world of love stories.

Derek went and grabbed a drink and headed back quickly. The moment he walked in, Penelope looked up at him.

"Hey Hot Stuff," Penelope said as he came back in. "I've been waiting."

Derek did a double take. It happened like this from time to time. He'd spend hours with her, but all it would take was him leaving the room for a couple of minutes and he'd have an ounce of his wife back.

"Gonna stand there?" Penelope asked him, "I was just telling this handsome man that just left that you were on your way and always kept me waiting."

"Sorry, Baby Girl," He said to her and walked in, giving her a kiss as a welcome. "How you feeling?" He asked her for the second time that day.

Penelope smiled at him as she grabbed her knitting that hadn't changed in months. "I'm feeling good, missing the kids as always. However, I did just spend the past twenty minutes or so talking about you to some man that just literally left."

"Is that so?" Derek asked back, ignoring the pang in his heart.

"I did indeed. He was handsome just like you, called Derek too," She said with smile and then looked at her bedside table at the picture of her children. "My kids?"

"They should be here by now."

"Would you go and check, Handsome?" She asked him, her mind still oblivious to their reminiscing from not even ten minutes ago. He wouldn't complain, he had his wife sitting in front of him.

"Sure, Sweetness," He told her and stood up.

"Don't be long," She told him as she stilled her knitting and accepted a quick kiss off of him.

Derek left the room again; his gut feeling was that the end was sooner rather than later. He shook the feeling as he saw his children walking up the corridor. Approaching them he cautiously made them aware that Penelope wasn't quite with it. He daren't say about the rising concerns for her health other than that their mother's memory was cutting in and out more so than before.

He approached his children, embracing his grandchildren in hugs as they ran up to hug him excitedly. "Go into her, she's having a good moment," He told them all with a smile. He gave them a positive vibe for them to go in.

"You coming in Pops?" His son TJ said as he and his sister stopped and watched their father with some concern.

Derek looked at his son, "I'll be in, in a few minutes. I just need to talk to your mom's carer about something." He told them truthfully, "Go into her."

None of his children said a thing to him after that. They allowed him to go towards the nurse's station, now an unstoppable force. Derek didn't miss them all exchanging worried looks as they went.

Derek decided on a whim that he wanted his wife home. _Whilst she still understood who he was and loved him_. He knew that if he left and came back in the morning she would lose all her memory of who he was and he would have to start again. It was a rarity that she became this like herself for any length of time and he took it as an omen.

After all, he was tired of reminding the love of his life of his identity. Tired of fighting her disbeliefs and he was tired of listening to her tell him their love stories like he had no idea what they were about or how it felt. However much he said he didn't mind, Derek Morgan was tired of losing his wife every day.

Listening to his gut he made the executive decision to take her home. Something within him was telling him that tonight was the night that he and Penelope would be reunited in perfection. He had no crazy ideas or murderous plots, he wanted a night where he could hold his wife in their bed and if he was wrong and woke up tomorrow then he would bring her back and start the rat race again.

After all he was never a man to give up.

"Ahh Mr Morgan," The nurse said as she put the files away, "Are your family going to be here long? I think we need to get Penelope settled again."

"I want to take Penelope home," Derek replied to question. Disregarding her idea of order in this care home.

"It isn't wise, Mr Morgan," One of the on duty nurses stepped in and said to him apologetically. "It's best she stay here."

"She's my wife and she deserves to have some comfort." Derek argued back, he was not taking no for an answer. "Some-" He paused for a second, "_Familiarity_."

"You know as well as I do that patients with Dementia don't understa-"

"Don't start telling me what I do and don't know. I've read enough to know what the end stages are going to get like and right now she is more like my wife than ever. Regardless of what the doctors now say about her mental health and general health, I want her to have one night with me at our house that we built up together before I never get a chance again."

"Mr Morgan," Then nurse pressed on with her disapproval.

"I'm an eighty six year old man who just wants one more night with his wife whilst she still remembers him," Derek told her forthrightly. "Is that so much to ask for? _One night_."

The nurse pursed her lips together before releasing her breath. "Okay," The nurse finally caved, "But she comes back tomorrow first thing."

"Thank you," Derek breathed and had never felt more at ease about going home. He almost wanted to kiss the nurse there and then, but reframed.

"I'll arrange the transport and then we'll get her ready. One of Penelope's carers can help you with getting her comfortable at home." She told him firmly, her face telling him how unhappy she was with this decision.

"I can do it," Derek argued back. He might well be an old wilting man, but he was unrelenting in giving up any idea that he was still the same man he was when he met Penelope.

"You're having a carer come with you back to the house and only when they're satisfied that you're okay on your own will they leave," She held her ground then, remaining unmoved on her plan of how this was going to happen.

"Fine," He gave in. If he had to get Penelope home like this then he was happy.

Derek went back to his family then with a skip in his stride. Finally he could add one last story to their long list of stories.

**-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- Holder of my Heart -=-=-=-=-=-=-=-**

It had been a while since Derek had helped his wife get ready for bed, but here he was, granted one night to have her home and he had already fulfilled the duty of doting husband. He had fed her, red to her like he always did, shared more stories and now he was getting her ready for bed. Slowly and carefully, he laid her down and then walked to his side, the entire time knowing Penelope was watching him.

He got changed and then climbed in and immediately took Penelope in his arms as she sought his comfort. It had been too long without this and now the loneliness disappeared from his entire body.

As he lay there in their bed with his wife next to him, he realised that a forty five year long love was nowhere near as long as he wanted it to be. Then again there were not enough years in a life to make it as long as he wanted.

Closing his eyes he heard her breathing loosen and she put her hand onto his chest, "I love you, Derek." Penelope whispered into the darkness and he could almost trick himself to believe that she was his Penelope again.

He opened his eyes in shock as he heard her speak one last time before falling into her peaceful sleep. He followed as she spoke to him and he found sleep easily, a small smile on his lips.

"See you on the other side." She whispered to him, her voice almost dying out.

He knew he made their right decision by taking her home as he woke up in heaven with Penelope by his side. He felt her take his hand and he looked at their now smooth skin and then cast his gaze up to her face. He watched her face illuminate into a bright wide smile. Her laughter lines less defined now, her grey hair now blonde and full of curls, her eyes looking at him with immediate recognition - A look he had only come to dream about.

"Welcome to the good life, Mr Morgan," She said as her ruby red lips pulled into a seductive smirked.

Here they resumed their love story for an eternity.

**-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- Holder of my Heart -=-=-=-=-=-=-=-**

**The End!**

**-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- Holder of my Heart -=-=-=-=-=-=-=-**

**A/N:**_ Loosely inspired by the film The Notebook – my friend made me watch and that turned the story into romantic shots that led to this ending... Hope you liked! =)_


End file.
